1 April 2016

Published March 30, 2016 by rochellewisoff

Thoreau Mugs

Friday Fictioneers and Poppy

The following photo is the PROMPT. Keep in mind that all photos are the property of the contributor, therefore copyrighted and require express permission to use for purposes other than Friday Fictioneers. Giving credit to whom credit is due is proper etiquette. 

Please make an effort to stay within the suggested word count. While 50 to 100 words over the limit might not seem like much  to the writer, in the context of reading up a hundred stories, it’s a little inconsiderate. Use your imagination and pare it down. It can be done and you might be surprised at how few words you need to create a scene or tell a story.

PHOTO PROMPT © Marie Gail Stratford

PHOTO PROMPT © Marie Gail Stratford

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Genre: Hysterical Non-Fiction

Word Count: 100

PREMIER SALES DITCH

“Everyone gets a facial.” My friend Jennifer’s voice crackled with enthusiasm through the phone. “It’s great fun and you can make a ton of money.”

That night, at a rah-rah recruiting meeting as her fresh meat du jour special guest, I swallowed the hook.

__________

Pink Cadillacs sped along my mind’s highway as I arrived at my first skincare party.

Setting Styrofoam sample trays before potential customers, I touted my product’s miraculous benefits. “A hide tanner discovered the formula.”

One dainty lady dipped her fingertip into the moisturizer and frowned. “You expect me to put this shit on my face?”  

***

I recently did a blog interview with Deborah Kalb. To read it, click HERE

96 comments on “1 April 2016

    • Dear Suzanne,

      They say that truth is better than fiction and sometimes harder to believe. It was a long time ago. I was trying to find something where I didn’t have to pay for childcare. Ah well, I’m glad it’s just a memory now. 😉 Glad you read the interview, too.

      Thank you.

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Like

  • Not going to be the quick win she was hoping for! These things always sound to me like a lot of hard work for very little return. More a way to meet new people than make your fortune.
    Great story, loved the title!

    Liked by 2 people

  • There’s precious little money to be made from anything that isn’t full-time work, sadly. And sometimes very little from that. I’m not sure the word “hide-tanner” figures highly in the sales pitch league though. Made me smile, especially the dainty lady’s response. Nicely done, Rochelle.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Sandra,

      This is one of those rare ones that I just let it flow out to 187 words and pared it down. Great fun in practicing what I preach.
      The story of the hide-tanner was a big selling point in this cosmetic company. He noticed after working with this ‘formula’ how smooth his hands were. Think what it could do for your face. 😉 Let’s not mention what the whole thing did to my pocket book. Glad it made you smile.

      Thank you. Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

  • My first ever job (besides baby sitting) was selling cosmetics for Fashion 220, I don’t even know if they even exist still. Didn’t make much money and although I didn’t run into a client quite like the one described, I do remember a few who had me do their make-up because they had a special party and never thought to buy even a moisturizer. Ah … the memories. Have a great weekend!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Chioma,

      The fact is that it was, and still is, a good product. I really didn’t like booking the parties. I was never cut out to be a sales rep. The up side to that is I can spot those sales pitch lines a mile away. Thank you.

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

  • Ahh… yes. the wanting to find that little something that you can do in your spare time and make some moulah! Yeah… look at the ones going for their Director’s titles! The bags under their eyes tell the whole tale. You have to work your butt off to make it in this “just a little something to keep you busy job”!!

    Liked by 1 person

  • Dear Rochelle,

    The people who say anyone can succeed at direct sales are full of that stuff you told your potential customer to put on her face. 🙂 I love my work with PartyLite–as long as I can do it to have fun and have other means of income too, but I can’t stand any of that “rah-rah” stuff, regardless of which sales company it comes from.

    Great story! One of your best, IMHO.

    Peace and chicken grease,
    MG

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Marie Gail,

      I definitely wasn’t cut out for that kind of business. I’m glad you liked my story, though. Some things you just can’t make up. Know what I mean? Of course you do. 😉

      Thank you with hugs.

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

  • Haha! Seen things like this before. My wife’s friend is constantly trying to make us the “fresh meat du jour.” We aren’t buying it, and neither of us enjoys sales. Great slice of life piece, Rochelle. I enjoyed it!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Eric,

      To be sure, there are some “friends” I just avoid these days. Every encounter includes a new business they’re excited about and are going to get rich with. Glad you liked my story. It’s funny now. 😉

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

  • Your character said exactly what I should have said at my first facial party- my skin broke out (red all over) for the first time. Cheers to people who aren’t easily swayed and make you laugh while at it!. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  • Haha, great fun (although not for you at the time). I always loved the Avon and Tupperware parties my friends dragged me to.
    I also read the interview. It’s very interesting, great information on the background of your books.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Gabriele,

      it’s those life experiences that either destroy us or make great anecdotes. I prefer the latter. 😉 Interesting to see that things like Tupperware are universal and so are the parties.

      I’m pleased you read the interview. What impressed me with Ms. Kalb is that she took the time to read both novels before setting up the interview. Being Jewish, she related well to my stories and we had a great phone conversation.
      Thank you on all counts.

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Like

  • Love your real story, Rochelle. Had to laugh because I did the Mary Kay thing. I was a nurse with a full time job. I think nurses were targets because we know so many people and make a good salary. I got talked into buying a big order because you have to have the products if you want to sell. Well, I couldn’t sell and ended up giving away and eventually tossing away. A hard lesson.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear CE,

      It wasn’t too funny at the time. I’m so sorry to have offended with my ‘language.’ Sometimes the truth has to be written in an unladylike fashion. As for Scots…

      Thank you for commenting. (I think)

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

  • “Hysterical” is the perfect word. And, as usual, you throw your real punch with the last line. It makes perfect “fiction” as well — far enough out there to capture our imagination, but real enough to let us relate. I could SEE that “dainty lady” clearly.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Melony,

      If it made you giggle my work here is done. 😉 I’ve come to avoid these things like the plague. I buy Rubbermaid and Hefty disposable containers at the grocery and Cover Girl at the drug store. No parties, thank you very much.

      Thank you for your wonderful comments.

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

  • Dear Mary Kay,
    Maybe if that rude woman had smeared the cream on, it might have helped that horse’s ass face of hers. Everybody gets roped into that home party thing at least once. Connie did Amway back in the 70s. Only the people at the top of the pyramid get the pink Cadillac.

    Good luck with the bunion sander,
    Clark Kent

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Clark,

      I don’t remember you being there, but you must’ve been since you described the lady to a T. Ah, yes, we had ‘friends’ who tried to rope us into Amway. We dodged that bullet. And I rather like my Chevy Cruz. I suppose I could get it painted pink, but I’d prefer purple.

      Shalom,

      Mary Kay

      Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Laurie,

      Admittedly the parties can be fun, but I can’t stand high pressure sales. I guess that’s why I didn’t make it. I just couldn’t be that gung-ho sales lady.

      Thank you…happy to make you laugh.

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Amy,

      I’m pleased you read the interview and even left a comment. Working on the third and fourth book at the same time.

      As for the story. It seemed like a great idea at the time. The parties were fun for the most part but I’m really not a sales person.

      Thank you.

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

  • Rochelle, this is fantastic. I loved the strike through in the first part—I’ve never thought of using that in a story. It works brilliantly—it really adds to the voice of your character, who is clearly telling her story from a more jaded position now. The last line is just wonderful. It tells us everything. A great story.

    Like

    • Dear Helena,

      I’d seen one other person use the strike through. My husband actually thought I left it there by mistake. I’m glad you caught my intent. Thank you for such lovely comments and compliments. 😀

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Like

  • Oh dear. I laughed so much at this. I have to confess to joining you and those other commenters who’ve dabbled briefly in the murky waters of party plan selling. I suspect, from the pink cadillacs, that I was with the same team as you. What a disaster. Wonderfully told, Rochelle. Wonderful.

    Like

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