I can’t believe I’m doing this. Blame it on my good friend Dale and her friends Marc and  Karen.  All I can say is, “Oy.” Normally, I’m not a fan of doing prompts that require certain words. For whatever reason the muse wrestled me to the ground this morning and challenged me. Happy Sunday.

The required words are: Jesus, holy water, drive-thru, twinkies, wine, dinosaurs, passion, busybody, clubhouse, cross, absolution

Genre: Hysterical Fiction

Word Count: 150

JUST KILL ME ALREADY 

“Don’t cross me this morning,” Miriam staggered to the kitchen table. “I had too much wine last night at the clubhouse.”

Yosi passed her a plate of Twinkies. “Here, mommy. Breakfast of champions.”

Biting into one of the golden cakes, she let the cream filling melt on her tongue. At that moment the phone rang.

The voice on the other end shrilled with passion. “Good morning, Miriam.”

Miriam rolled her eyes. Oy. It’s that busybody Mary-Agnes. Probably going to preach to me about Jesus and how I can find absolution.”

Agnes continued, seemingly unaware that Miriam had only groaned a greeting. “Father O’Malley tripped over the holy water this morning in church. Totally drenched a kid playing with  his plastic dinosaurs on the front row.”

Choking on her coffee, Miriam finally said, “I have to go, Aggie. They’re having a special on gefilte fish and fries at the Kosher drive-thru.”