Humor

All posts in the Humor category

Weekend Writing Prompt – Dire

Published November 28, 2020 by rochellewisoff

A word prompt to get your creativity flowing this weekend.  How you use the prompt is up to you.  Write a piece of flash fiction, a poem, a chapter for your novel…anything you like.  Or take the challenge below – there are no prizes – it’s not a competition but rather a fun writing exercise.  If you want to share what you come up with, please leave a link to it in Sammi’s Comment Section. 

So this is where the word took me. I couldn’t help it, it was there. 😉 (Forgive me, Mark Knopfler.)

DIRE LYRICS

Back in the ‘90’s my husband Jan and a coworker argued over certain song lyrics. It didn’t matter how many times or ways Jan pointed out and proved the error. Kevin wouldn’t budge.

Even now, when we hear Dire Straits sing it, we laugh and sing along using Kevin’s lyrics. “We’re the sultans, we’re the sultans of suede.”

*

*

And just for fun…it’s such a great song, especially with the right words.

 

 

27 November 2020

Published November 25, 2020 by rochellewisoff

Like us on Facebook 

The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit.

PHOTO PROMPT © Susan Eames

Click Frog to Join the Fun

Genre: Realistic Fiction

Word Count: 100

REBOOT

Last night was my first time on the dance floor since my husband died five years ago. And this happens. I’m not sure which aches more, my fractured ankle or my pride. Chuck must think I’m a klutz.

I wait for the hydrocodone to kick in.

Why’d I let my pushy sister talk me into a blind date?

“I’m not ready,” I’d insisted.

“If not now—when?”

My phone rings.

Chuck’s delicious voice caresses my ear. “Sorry about my overgrown clodhoppers. I’d like to make it up to you over dinner. May I come over?”

Perhaps I’m ready after all. 

***

Happily the above story is pure fiction. 😀 He’s very much alive, for which I’m grateful! Our friends and family gave us 6 months. Happy 49th Anniversary to my first husband, Jan Wayne Fields.

Weekend Writing Prompt – Paradox

Published November 21, 2020 by rochellewisoff

A word prompt to get your creativity flowing this weekend.  How you use the prompt is up to you.  Write a piece of flash fiction, a poem, a chapter for your novel…anything you like.  Or take the challenge below – there are no prizes – it’s not a competition but rather a fun writing exercise.  If you want to share what you come up with, please leave a link to it in Sammi’s Comment Section.

IT BEGAN IN 1971

(IN 71 WORDS)

“You’re not in love.” My mother fumed. “You’re in lust. Only eighteen. Too young to know your own mind.”

Nonetheless, I dug in my heels. My dad walked me down the aisle, a sorrowful expression on his face and tears in his eyes. “You can always come home if it doesn’t work out.”

“I give them six months,” said my aunt.

A paradox in progress.  

Forty-nine years later, we’re still married.

This photo is only 15 minutes old at this posting.

November 28, 1971

 

Weekend Writing Prompt – Wrangle

Published November 14, 2020 by rochellewisoff

A word prompt to get your creativity flowing this weekend.  How you use the prompt is up to you.  Write a piece of flash fiction, a poem, a chapter for your novel…anything you like.  Or take the challenge below – there are no prizes – it’s not a competition but rather a fun writing exercise.  If you want to share what you come up with, please leave a link to it in Sammi’s Comment Section.

 

THE CHILDREN’S MARCHING SONG

“Stupid song.” My brother turned the dial.

“It’s not your radio.”  

“Is, too.”

Today, any wrangle is settled with a grin and

“It wasn’t your radio.”

“It was a stupid song.”

“Was not.”

 

I’m happy to report that sibling rivalry has turned to sibling revelry. Although both of us are still as ornery as we ever were. Blame it on our dad. 

Weekend Writing Prompt – Vault

Published October 24, 2020 by rochellewisoff

A word prompt to get your creativity flowing this weekend.  How you use the prompt is up to you.  Write a piece of flash fiction, a poem, a chapter for your novel…anything you like.  Or take the challenge below – there are no prizes – it’s not a competition but rather a fun writing exercise.  If you want to share what you come up with, please leave a link to it in Sammi’s Comment Section.

 

FROM 1956 TO 2007 IN 56 WORDS

My parents bought the single-story house in 1956

By 1984, my folks both gone, we moved in with three growing sons.

At the time it seemed like a good idea.

Thirty-eight years lived within the confines of 950 square feet.

When asked why empty nesters would buy a castle with vaulted ceilings

We reply,

“Breathing room.”

 

Three times the size of that little house, to us, this place is a castle. We bought it 13 years ago and I still love it!

 

23 October 2020

Published October 21, 2020 by rochellewisoff

Like us on Facebook 

The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit.

PHOTO PROMPT – © Rochelle Wisoff-Fields

CLICK THE FROG TO JOIN THE PARTY

This week marks my 8th anniversary as Friday Fictioneers facilitator and my 5th anniversary as a retired sign maker/cake decorator. So I’m taking the liberty of sharing a twofer. 

Genre: Hysterical Faction

Word Count: 100

HONCHO DORI

My coworker and best friend was fired for saying, of all things, “Hunky Dory.” Her flippant reply to my “How’s your day going?”  at her register. I kid you not. The charge was “sarcasm to a customer and, therefore, misconduct.” Seriously?

The company’s plan to purge the “old folks” put a target on my back, too.

At an emotional low I joined Friday Fictioneers. I tried it. I loved it. By October 24, I inherited the blog challenge.

Eight years later, my friend’s victorious lawsuit is a story we retell with glee. Friday Fictioneers? Yep, I’m still steering the bus.

It’s still hunky dory with us.

YEE-HAW!!!

I ran out words to tell you my friend was fired March 7, 2012 and I joined Friday Fictioneers a month later on April 12.

****

Now for the second go around as promised. 😉 I posted this 24 October 2012, after inheriting Friday Fictioneers from creator Madison Woods. This was the only time I didn’t title my post with the date. I was told by a fictioneer that it was too confusing for me to post my title because it gave the impression that my title was part of the prompt. I complied and never saw her again. Go figure. There are some fictioneers who stuck with me, even though they were here before me. You know who you are. 😉 If I list them I’m bound to leave someone out. At any rate here’s my first story as facilitator. Same photo prompt. 

Genre: Realistic Fiction

Word Count: 100

OF SIGHT AND SOUND

A stunning contradiction of cropped black hair, bronzed skin and sea foam blue eyes, Aggie McKewen’s face reflected her Inuit and Scottish parentage.

Keith, who worked at his uncle’s café in Seward County, Alaska, longed to speak to her but didn’t know sign language and she was fencepost deaf.  Every Saturday he served her grilled salmon in shy silence.

After six weeks of night classes he felt ready to declare himself and asked her out.

With a voiceless giggle she snatched his pen and order pad. There she wrote, “I’d love to but why did you call me a tampon?”

Weekend Writing Prompt – Lucid

Published October 17, 2020 by rochellewisoff

A word prompt to get your creativity flowing this weekend.  How you use the prompt is up to you.  Write a piece of flash fiction, a poem, a chapter for your novel…anything you like.  Or take the challenge below – there are no prizes – it’s not a competition but rather a fun writing exercise.  If you want to share what you come up with, please leave a link to it in Sammi’s Comment Section.

LIMPID

The phone chimes at midnight, rousting me from sweet dreams.

I shut my eyes.

At once, my mind explodes into overdrive.

My eyelids snap open.

The coming day’s events loom large.

Sometimes I want to be lucid.

This isn’t one of those times.

Weekend Writing Prompt – Asinine

Published October 10, 2020 by rochellewisoff

A word prompt to get your creativity flowing this weekend.  How you use the prompt is up to you.  Write a piece of flash fiction, a poem, a chapter for your novel…anything you like.  Or take the challenge below – there are no prizes – it’s not a competition but rather a fun writing exercise.  If you want to share what you come up with, please leave a link to it in Sammi’s Comment Section.

GUILTY PLEASURE

I’m a streaming junkie.

I’ve binged on Star Trek from the original series through Deep Space Nine.

Illogical?

Asinine?

Perhaps.

Anxiously I await the next season of Picard.

Fascinating.

Last month I watched both seasons of Shtisel, an Israeli series about a Haredi household.

Currently, I’m gorging my senses on Heaven’s Garden. It’s a Korean family series.

Subtitles.

Oh, my square eyes.

I must confess,

Sometimes I feel like Nero fiddling while Rome burns.

9 October 2020

Published October 7, 2020 by rochellewisoff

South KC Sky Banner

Like us on Facebook 

Ellehcor Banner FF

The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit.

PHOTO PROMPT © Sandra Crook

CLICK THE FROG TO PARTAKE

Genre: Hysterical Fiction

Word Count: 100

STALKING THE WILD EDIBLES

“Seriously, Daddy?” Ariel jabbed her fork into a plateful of fishy-smelling seaweed. “You expect me to eat this?”

“Don’t knock it ‘til you’ve tried it. Full of antioxidants, fiber, and vitamins,” said Louis. “Expertly prepared by Yours Truly. Ever hear of Euell Gibbons?

“Who?”

“Famous 1960’s naturalist. One winter, his family was down to their last egg and a few pinto beans. He went out and picked a knapsack full of puffball mushrooms, piñon nuts, and yellow prickly pear fruits. Kept them from starving.”

Ariel lifted a green strand, sniffed and grimaced. “It looks like something a Klingon would eat.”

Euell Gibbon, who became famous promoting Grape Nuts cereal. He took a lot of ribbing. Here he is taking a poke at himself.

To know a little more about him CLICK HERE

Weekend Writing Prompt – Zany

Published September 27, 2020 by rochellewisoff

A word prompt to get your creativity flowing this weekend.  How you use the prompt is up to you.  Write a piece of flash fiction, a poem, a chapter for your novel…anything you like.  Or take the challenge below – there are no prizes – it’s not a competition but rather a fun writing exercise.  If you want to share what you come up with, please leave a link to it in Sammi’s comment section.

Some of you might know I’m a logophile…a word nerd. I have the old, no longer supported, Scrabble app on my phone and on my iPad. No bells or whistles. No connection to the internet. Just the way I like it. However I do miss the interaction of a rousing game with friends. So I give you a little wishful thinking. 

GAME ON

“Z-A-N-Y” Rochelle arranged the tiles on the Scrabble board. “Ha! Thirty points to open the game.”

Dale flashed a smile. “Big deal.”

“Can you do better?”

To Rochelle’s chagrin, Dale played the Q, U and I off the Z for forty-four points on a double word.

Na’ama dumped her tiles back in the box. “I’ve a better idea. Let’s bake some bread.”

***

If you’re in the neighborhood come visit my virtual booth at the PeaceworksKC art fair to day from 11-5 CDT.

Riverbrat

Navigating the mountains and valleys of everyday life on the riverbank.

Our Literary Journey

Driveling twaddle by an old flapdoodle.

Addicted To Living

learning from one crazy experience to the next.

saania2806.wordpress.com/

Philosophy is all about being curious, asking basic questions. And it can be fun!

Invincible Woman on Wheels

Conquering the World

This, that and the other thing

Looking at life through photography and words

Kelvin M. Knight

FLASHES of inspiration. SHORT deliberations. STORIES for all.

Na'ama Yehuda

Speech Language Pathologist, Writer, Blogger -- musings, anecdotes, stories, quotes, life lessons and growth

Diane's Ponderings

Psalm 19:1 The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands.

Jellico's Writing Nook

A cup of coffee and a quiet morning respite to write

Penz-o-Paula

Paula Shablo

Lost Imperfect Found

Self-discovery through self-reflection.

Sarah Potter Writes

Pursued by the muses of prose, poetry, and art

Sammi Cox

Author Aspiring

Neil MacDonald Author

A writer's journey

Autumn Leaves

For those who enjoy fiction

Native Heritage Project

Documenting the Ancestors

Living In Eternity

If Eternity Is Forever, Am I There Now?

Rereading Jane Eyre

Author Luccia Gray

zicharonot

Catskills Memories, Genealogy, travel and commentary

e.l. dalke: survivor

a journey of fractures, in my own words

Creativity for You

Posts about creativity from Thomas Ward, Professor Emeritus of Psychology, University of Alabama.

WHAT PEGMAN SAW

a weekly flash fiction prompt inspired by google maps

Lori Ericson, Author

An author's perspective of mystery and more.

%d bloggers like this: