Humor

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21 January 2022

Published January 19, 2022 by rochellewisoff
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Friday Fictioneers and Poppy

The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit.

PHOTO PROMPT © Ted Strutz

Genre: Memoir
Word Count: 100
WORLD OF HER OWN

Her fourth-grade teacher dubbed her “Messy Bessy.” Each time the frustrated child attempted to organize her desk chaos quickly returned.

Mrs. Smith moved the girl’s desk to the front of the room. Perhaps sitting beside the teacher would encourage her to mend her slovenly ways.

The kid didn’t mean to misbehave. Reading or illustrating stories she wrote in her head took priority over neatness. She’d simply lose herself in her latest adventure.  

One morning, Mrs. Smith jolted Rochelle from the Ingalls’ cabin on the prairie with, “Miss Wisoff, would you care to join the class for our daily spelling test?”

My granddaughter Olive and her faithful companion Poppy

7 January 2022

Published January 5, 2022 by rochellewisoff
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The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit.

PHOTO PROMPT © Brenda Cox

Genre: Fiction
Word Count: 100
FLOWER AND WILLOW WORLD

A thousand butterflies swirl in my stomach as I peer out the window, watching for the car that will bring my Hoshi-chan, my shining star, for a brief visit.

After we left her at the Okiya in Kyoto, six months ago, I cried for a week.

At her Misedashi my heart swelled with pride. In exquisite silk kimono, painted face and elegant jeweled hair, Hoshi, renamed Kikuyu, was welcomed into the secret society of Geisha.

She glided to me on lacquered getas and uttered those words I will forever cherish. “Okaasan, when I come home, please cook me a hamburger.”

Original Artwork © Rochelle Wisoff-Fields

31 December 2021

Published December 29, 2021 by rochellewisoff

The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit. 

PHOTO PROMPT © Dale Rogerson

Genre: Questionable
Word Count: 100

HAPPY NEW YEAR…LITERALLY

“All the falderal’s done for another year.” Meg gathered wadded giftwrap and fumed. “Just look at the pine needles littering floor.”

 “Don’t be a Scrooge,” whispered Beth.

Amy frowned. “Where’s your holiday spirit, Meg?”

Meg handed her a broom. “Make yourself useful.”

 Jo opened her brand new, leatherbound thesaurus. “‘Falderal’…’absurdity, baloney, humbug.’”

Ebenezer popped the cork on a bottle of champagne. “Let’s make merry!”

“Grandfather sent goat cheese for the party,” cried Heidi.  

“Then a toast,” said Bob Cratchit.

Asher Lev set aside his paintbrush and raised a glass. “L’chaim!”

Tiny Tim beamed. “God bless our Friday Fictioneers’ muses everyone.”

*Apologies to Louisa May Alcott, Charles Dickens, Johanna Spyri and Chaim Potok.

3 December 2021

Published December 1, 2021 by rochellewisoff
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The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit.

PHOTO PROMPT © LIsa Fox

Genre: Hysterical Fiction
Word Count: 100

THINK TANK

“The things we take for granted,” said Shelley. “Who amongst us doesn’t ascend the porcelain throne upon arising? Wipe. Flush. Ready to face the day.”

“Run for cover.” Russell rolled his eyes. “The history faucet’s a-fixin’ to spout.”

“Do you know who invented toilet paper?”

“No, but I bet you’re gonna to tell me.”    

Shelley took a deep breath. “Joseph Gayetty in 1857. He introduced it as ‘Medicated Paper.’

“Great Scott!”

“Precisely! The Scott brothers marketed their ScotTissue in 1879. Although Seth Wheeler patented his version in 1891.

“Well, everybody poops.” Russell snorted. “One could say they saved our butts.”

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CLICK FOR MORE FUN FACTS ABOUT TOILET TISSUE

26 November 2021

Published November 24, 2021 by rochellewisoff

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The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit.

PHOTO PROMPT © Roger Bultot

 

CLICK to join the festivities.

Genre: Realistic Faction
Word Count: 100

Please add your Story URL to the inLinkz list after you click the link, rather than leaving it in my comment section. This way more people will be able to find and read your story. Thank you.
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ONE SEASON FOLLOWING ANOTHER

Rochelle gazed at the pile of wedding gifts needing to be put away. Among them were three percolators. Neither she nor Jan even drank coffee.

Six months ago, she’d flashed her engagement ring at the senior prom.

With mounting dread, she surveyed the cramped, third floor walk-up apartment with red and black kitchen cabinets. What did she know about marriage?

***

Rochelle downed her second cup of black coffee. “My mother gave us six months at the most.”

Jan poured his third. “What did we know about marriage?”

She kissed his cheek. “Guess we managed to learn something in fifty years.”

Weekend Writing Prompt – Blue

Published November 21, 2021 by rochellewisoff

A word prompt to get your creativity flowing this weekend.  How you use the prompt is up to you.  Write a piece of flash fiction, a poem, a chapter for your novel…anything you like.  Or take the challenge below – there are no prizes – it’s not a competition but rather a fun writing exercise.  If you want to share what you come up with, please leave a link to it in Sammi’s Comment Section.

COLORS

Dale perused Rochelle’s photos. “Sweet. All those bridesmaids in royal blue velvet.”

After fifty years, Rochelle still remembered the scent of her yellow roses. “I liked their dresses better than mine.”

“Why blue and not purple?”

“Good question.”

Drat. You really can’t see that the dresses were royal blue or velvet. Thanks to Dale for bluing up the photo. I’m not sure, in looking back, why I didn’t have purple in the color scheme. It might’ve had more to do with my mother. 😉

22 October 2021

Published October 20, 2021 by rochellewisoff

Apologies for the tardiness of this post. As most know, I schedule ahead. It turns out I scheduled for the wrong day. Again my humble apologies for the error.

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The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit.

PHOTO PROMPT © Rochelle Wisoff-Fields.
The ever so clever Keith Hillman designed this one and I had to snag it! CLICK TO JOIN

Genre: Realistic Fiction
Word Count: 100

I’LL HAVE WHAT SHE’S HAVING

“You can’t beat us Jews for food.” Rochelle bit into a thick pastrami on rye and savored the salty meat, slathered with mustard. She wiped the dribbled juices from her chin. “It’s almost a religious experience.”

            “Where’s the mayo?”

            She slapped Jan’s hand. “Don’t you dare, Goy Wonder.”

“May I, at least, have ketchup on the fries?”

“Katz’s Delicatessen was established in 1888 by Eastern European immigrants Morris and Hyman Iceland. Their cousin Sam Katz joined them in 1903. Eventually, they shortened the name from Iceland and Katz to the present one.

            “Do you charge extra for the history lesson?”  

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You’ll find Katz’s Deli on Houston Street (that’s pronounced HOWston). Meg Ryan and Billy Crystal shared lunch there in the movie “When Harry Met Sally.” CLICK to watch.

I’m here to tell you, the pastrami is amazing! If you’re ever in New York City, you owe it to yourself. Don’t forget the pickled tomatoes and seltzer. 😉 Remember to leave a tip.

And if you have an extra 8 minutes or so go to the following link and experience a little of what we’re talking about. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fLt5cKJelis

Weekend Writing Prompt – Legion

Published October 17, 2021 by rochellewisoff

A word prompt to get your creativity flowing this weekend.  How you use the prompt is up to you.  Write a piece of flash fiction, a poem, a chapter for your novel…anything you like.  Or take the challenge below – there are no prizes – it’s not a competition but rather a fun writing exercise.  If you want to share what you come up with, please leave a link to it in Sammi’s comment section.

To quote Chief Dan, “Sometimes the magic works and sometimes it doesn’t.” 😉

WORD COUNT THIRTY-TWO

A legion of words

Stomps through my mind

Some march straight ahead

Others veer off

Right

Careening left.

I try to catch them

Make them fit together.

Twenty-eight down

Four to go.

No reason for the picture. 😉 Enjoy the goats. 😀

8 October 2021

Published October 6, 2021 by rochellewisoff

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The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit.

PHOTO PROMPT © Roger Bultot

Genre: Fiction
Word Count: 100
PHOTOGRAPHS AND MEMORIES

“Antique photographs fascinate me.” Rochelle rinsed her paintbrush. “Wouldn’t you love to know what the people in them are thinking?’

            Russell scratched his chin as if deep in thought. “The kid is probably wishing the photographer would hurry up and get it over with. His father’s thirsty for a tall cold one.”

            “The woman wants to loosen her corset.” Dale leaned back in her chair. “Can you imagine being imprisoned in one of those contraptions?”

            “Dear me, no,” said the grandmother of nine. “I wonder what Zing and Zang would say?”

            “There you go.” Rochelle grinned. “Our next photo prompt!”  

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Weekend Writing Prompt – Portmanteau

Published September 26, 2021 by rochellewisoff

A word prompt to get your creativity flowing this weekend.  How you use the prompt is up to you.  Write a piece of flash fiction, a poem, a chapter for your novel…anything you like.  Or take the challenge below – there are no prizes – it’s not a competition but rather a fun writing exercise.  If you want to share what you come up with, please leave a link to it in Sammi’s Comment Section.

I’ll admit to being on the grammar police squad. My mother instilled it in me early in life.

“Ain’t isn’t proper English.”

            It’s “they were” NOT “they was.” And “was you?” No way. No how.  

“I seen it” makes me cringe.

I beg you on bended knees, for the sake of my bleeding ears, refrain from committing such grammatacide.

***

  • Dictionary.com defines a portmanteau word as one that combines the form and meaning of two other words. Hence “grammatacide” is mine. 😉

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