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The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit.
Genre: Realistic Fiction
Word Count: 100
WHAT A GREAT LIFE IT MUST SEEM
“You’re such a success, Elise.” says Mary. “I’m jealous.”
“You got it all, girlfriend,” Barbara adds. “You’re a published author and an artist? If I could do what you do, I’d truly be happy.”
Her compliment is coupled with a longing gaze at Elise’s recently finished seascape.
A mixture of pride and something other than joy floods Elise as her admirers kiss her cheek and leave. She sinks to her knees under the weight of her adult daughter’s scathing words, spewed in anger the night before. Her accusations haunt Elise and reduce her to ash.
“I’m such a failure.”
Oh Rochelle, I like this. It’s layered and thought-provoking
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Many thanks, Neil.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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This story shows deep emotion, Rochelle and shows we can’t always tell just by looking. Good writing as always. —- Suzanne
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Dear Suzanne,
We never know what battles another person is fighting, do we? Thank you for your kind words.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Such a deeply disturbing scene. Very powerfully written too, dear Rochelle.
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Dear Neel,
Thank you for your kind words. They’re like a healing balm.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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A truth we often don’t consider, that there is often another reality behind the mask we all wear. Beautiful and sad, Rochelle. ❤️
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Dear Jan,
I wonder how we would treat others if we knew what battles they were fighting? Thank you for your lovely comment.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Great story. Until the end I was thinking of every artist that does not appreciate their own works as much as others do, but then I got to that last paragraph…. Success and and failure in life can be so much more than artistic/monetary/vocational/status/etc success and failure, with the poorest of the poor being more successful than the richest of the rich in what really counts.
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Dear Trent,
Everyone wears a mask, don’t we? We never know the full extent of the sorrow behind them. Thank you for your generous comment.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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We do wear a mask, or more like different masks for different people. And we are often too harsh on ourselves, and thus need those masks…
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Ah, Rochelle. You’ve really touched a chord here. Nothing hurts and goes straight to your most vulnerable spot like the angry words of an adult child you’ve loved and nourished the best way you know, only to find they have turned on you.
Really good story.
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Granonine – i took away exactly what you noted –
“most vulnerable spot like the angry words of an adult child you’ve loved and nourished the best way you know,
and HOW maybe not having success there (with dear family – esp children) pulls from any other personal success….
—
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Yes. I see so much of that sort of pain in my counseling office. Very sad.
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Yes – and so often parents have to release some of that sting – healthy detachment but not avoidance – and NEVER say failure -nope.
—
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Dear Linda (and Yvette),
Nursing and potty training don’t prepare us for the barbs of an adult child. Partly because we believe what they say and internalize it, don’t we? Thank you for your kind comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thanks Rochelle – and joyce Meyer once shared a fun story.
She said her adult son was complaining to her that she did not do this or that right.
She said something like, “Son, I am not and cannot be perfect but I am
A huge improvement over what my parents offered me. You have the same chance – to improve on my parenting.”
And then she reminded them something about how she loves them soooo much.
—
And I think what can take the sting away is to rise above and maybe see where the anger – disappointment – frustration is coming from with the huge reminder that no one is perfect and sometimes grace assuages much! Grace – support and love-
And then ask how can we rebuild now so we can “make deposits and not mere withdrawals” in our relationship account!
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The story also emphasizes the fact that you never know what is behind the mask that people present in public. Be kind. Words can cut deeper than any two edged sword. Nice story.
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True story, m’love. Thank you.
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Great story, Rochelle. It’s interesting that no amount of external praise or accomplishment can make up for the hole inside us. I remember reading an interview with Madonna where she said she can get a hundred people saying she’s brilliant and one person saying she sucks and she will fixate on the one person. I guess we’re all like that at times.
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Dear Josh,
It’s the human condition I fear. And the other man’s grass is always greener, isn’t it? No one can injure a parent like an adult child. Guilt at what we did or didn’t do as parents makes us more vulnerable to the barbs. 😦 Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
PS Yeah…I relate to Madonna. 😉
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This is a beautiful image to work with Rochelle. I hope you enjoy my effort this week.
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Hi Pensitivity,
I’m glad you like the photo. Naturally, I hope you like my story as well. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Indeed I did.
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There are many ways to judge life a success, some of them not as obvious as the fame and celebrity. Wonderful as always Rochelle.
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Dear Iain,
Judging from the numerous divorces we see among celebrities, I’d have to quote a Loretta Lynn song, “Success has made a failure of our home.” 😉 Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelel
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Dear Rochelle,
My heart breaks for Elise. We, on the outside, see what we want, don’t we? Then again, we, show what we want to as well…
Beautifully done,
Lotsa, love and hugs,
Dale
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Dear Dale,
It’s interesting to see the different perspectives on one story in the comments. At any rate, thank you for your kind words and for knowing and caring about Elise. ❤
Shalom and hugs,
Rochelle
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That’s part of the joys of blogging… to me!
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I’ve heard of Nobel Prize winners whose families thought they were failures. You can’t be perfect in everything or please everyone. The daughter? I gotta wonder what her beef is.
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Kids always have a beef. No one knows you like family.
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What a soul-aching and painful story. Just breaks my heart to read it. Great writing and hoping that none of it is in any way true. ❤ Shalom~ Jelli
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Dear Jelli,
Well some of it is fiction. 😉 Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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A powerful story Rochelle, I wanted to shout that failure can be turned around,
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Dear Michael,
There’s always hope as long as we’re breathing. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Success is in the eye of the beholder or, the grass is always greener…
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Precisely, James.
Thank you and Shalom,
Rochelle
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Moving and true, Rochelle, and beautifully told. Everyone has their own definition of a successful life. Is there even such a thing? We all have our ups and downs and it’s good to be remembered of that when we envy someone. I hope Elise and her daughter will forgive each other.
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Dear Gabi,
It’s always easy to see the other man’s grass as greener isn’t it? At the same time a wealth of “successful” people have been married and divorced numerous times or are publicly estranged from parents or offspring. So what is success, really? I, too, hope that Elise and her daughter will forgive each other. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
What a painful and beautifully crafted story. Yes, nothing is more heart-wrenching than being on the receiving end of the hurtful words of a child whom you have loved, cared for and sacrificed for. I really feel for Elise.
Shalom,
AB
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Dear Adele,
No one can wound a parent like an adult child. Thank you for your kind words.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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A powerful write that resonates deeply.
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Many thanks, Dahlia.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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The soul of an artist is a tortured one. So easily brought low, so difficult to lift up. And it seems no amount of external praise can salve the wound cut by a spiteful child. I truly feel for Elise.
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Dear Eric,
I know what you mean about the tortured soul of an artist. A thin skinned lot are we. 😉 Thank you for your kind comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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What a wise story this is. We must never assume that those who seem to have so much on the surface aren’t struggling underneath. Acclaim and success are marvelous, but if you don’t have those bedrocks of love and companionship to support them, your life can be hollow indeed. For some reason Elise reminds me of a swan, all smooth elegance on the surface, underneath paddling like crazy just to stay afloat. Sad and moving tale, Rochelle
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Dear Lynn,
I love your description of Elise. I think you might just have her pegged. 😉 Thank you so much for your generous comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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My pleasure – you made Elise’s humanity shine through
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A powerful and emotional take on the picture Rochelle. loved it.
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Thank you so much, Deepa.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Vividly told story, packs a punch as it’s so accurately observed. I went to a training day recently about recognising your inner critic !! We all nodded in recognition.. well done.
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Dear Francine,
I know I’m my most virulent critic. 😉 Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Ah! It is the words that live in our hearts that make all the difference. Nice one, Rochelle!
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Thank you for your kind words, Vivian. ❤
Shalom,
Rochelle
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🙂
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All the accolades that outsiders can give don’t help with that kind of hurt
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Spot on comment, Larry. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Really like this – and I enjoyed the comments (so far) and you really delivered the angst a parent can feel with animosity with a child (adult child) and how other successes are great and will come and go – but also how we carry the pain.
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Further – I wonder if there is a bit of support system demonstrated here. Sometimes when we have success in an area (like with her art and the admiration of friends) it provides some steady anchoring and as the main character drops – maybe she is able to process a little bit more of the details with the daughter.
We do not know the details – and do not really need to because i am sure so many can relate.
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Ps curious…
did Barbara mean to say
“You got it all, girlfriend,”
or was it supposed to be:
“You’ve got it all, girlfriend,” Barbara adds. “
with the have included.
I ask because I just bought a little cube and it has sayings on it – and one is “you got this” and it seems to be the norm to leave out the have – wonder if grammar rules will change – just like we accepted “ain’t”
(just musing here)
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Dear Yvette,
Elise does have a good support system, but even the best support can’t prevent the pain of being wounded by an adult offspring.
Yes, “You got it all.” is what I meant to say. Not everyone uses proper grammar in everyday conversation. 😉
Thank you for your comprehensive and generous comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Good point about the speak vs write when it Comes to grammar/ and the timing was really why I mentioned it – getting that cube made me comment –
I am not a grammar police person – hope not big time – but years ago we had a supervisor who’d send out emails for goal stuff and she’d write “we got this – come on” and I did want to correct it – lol
Maybe it will become the norm – because WTF is now in the dictionary – and maybe “I seen” needs to be as well
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Oh Lordy, if “I seen” makes the dictionary I might slash my wrists. 😉
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Hahhahhs whew – thanks for the smile
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One more note for Elise:
Yes – the best support cannot “prevent” the pain – but with understanding and she Can see that we do not ever look at things as “failure” because that word does not apply to life successes – even flops are a healthy part of being a friggin human being who needs to learn and is just not going to please everyone!
And while many parents have mistakes they would take back – too often they are pained from faulty thinking – a little healthy detachment will remind Elise that her children are God’s children first – and he knew they’d be born to imperfect parents and then everyone would have strengths and flaws and life would be a learning process -and so we trust in that divine appointment
Further – Elise can take heart ❤️ because when we are not defined by successes or bumps and flops – when we accept and celebrate our life for being human raw and fully alive – when our definition of success rises above all of the outcomes we have a sense of peace and stability that says “how can we make it better going forward”
And maybe Elise needs much time with dose with her children – maybe she painted too much and neglected her mom role
Or maybe she just “was who she was” and it is what it friggin is! Lol
But I think the prevention is only part of it – then we need to get active – stir up thinking – not live in despair or only see it as such a personal negative – instead – ask what can do moving forward –
And maybe the success with the art stuff was a small gift from god to infuse (or try to ) a smile and god vibe so Elise could now say – “this sucks but let’s make some fresh moves towards gleaning whatever is to be gleaned here.
At the end of the day – sometimes not much will get restored or built anew – but to let despair and heaviness infuse the body is not healthy for mind body or spirit and it gets away from thinking objectively and with a confident – hopefully – problem-solving mindset
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One of the downsides of reaching any stage of maturity is having to endure the painful jibes of those less seasoned. The callousness of the young is beyond the pale.
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Dear Andrea,
In Judaism there’s the term Lashon Harah…Evil speaking. I fear we’re all guilty of it and it hurts to be the victim of a sharp tongue. Thank you for reading and commenting.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Theodora Rustbelt W(T)F,
I’m amazed at how far coniving, ungrateful offspring will go just to hurt their mother’s feelings. You’d think they’d at least have the decency to wait until she gets Alzhiemers and is in flea-bag nursing home to spew their hateful diatribe.
Your little tale made me think of the blonde who had an abortion (she didn’t think the baby was hers). It makes a good case for Pro Choice.
Making waves,
Carlton of Hanover
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Dear Carlton of Hanover,
Then there was the blonde who thought her typewriter was pregnant because it skipped a period. (They’re only old if you’ve heard them.)
I like your solution. I’ll send that onto Elise’s self-absorbed offspring.
Shalom,
Theodora Rustbelt W(T)F the artist of Amazon inflamed fame.
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A success in the eyes of the world, but she feels a failure at life’s greatest and hardest task; bringing up a child, because of maybe just one cross word.
A great piece Rochelle as ever.
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Dear Shrawley,
It’s hard to feel successful in the midst of the disparaging words of a disgruntled adult child. And it’s hard not to feel the guilt. 😦 Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Other’s perceptions don’t always meet how the artist conceived their work. It sucks when you succeed but you can’t acknowledge it. Why the daughter was scathing is left, also, to our interpretations. Enjoyed this.
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Dear Stu,
Hard to write a tell-all in 100 words. 😉 Thank you for your kind words.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Such a layered story. Indeed success can be judged on so many parameters. Loved the story and linked up for the first time.
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Dear Sonia,
I didn’t realize this was your first go with Friday Fictioneers. Than I must give you a hearty WELCOME! Thank you so much for your kind words re my story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thank you for the warm welcome. It’s a pleasure to be a part of Friday Fictioneers. I look forward to reading and writing more amazing posts.
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Our inner secrets and real life is very different from what others see. Very well depicted Rochelle
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Dear Akshata,
We all hide behind a mask. Which is not always a bad idea. 😉 Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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How sad. I hope this isn’t autobiographical.
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Dear Liz,
Might be…Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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It all depends on your perspective of success.
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True story. Thank you for coming by, Anurag.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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A success only to the public eye. Perhaps Elise spent too much time building that success at the expense of her home life. Nice piece 🙂
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Dear Ali,
That’s one way of looking at it. It has been fun to read the different perceptions of one 100 story. 😉 Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Putting on a brave face when we’re crushed inside is something I think we can all relate to. I know I can! Beautiful story, full of emotion.
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Dear Jennifer,
I’ve heard it said that we should always be considerate because we never know what battles the other person is fighting. Thank you for such a lovely comment/compliment.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Such a sad and vivid tale. That one piece of serious negativity just washes away all the compliments and kind words. But we can never know what kind of a battle a person is fighting inside. I would sincerely hope Elise gets an apology or at least an explanation from her daughter.
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Dear Jilly,
Elise isn’t holding her breath. 😉 I have heard it said that one “Aw shucks” can negate ten “Atta boy’s”. At least that’s one way to put it. Thank you for your lovely comment.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Hi Rochelle! I wish no one has to go through this. Tough to face it . Beautifully written. Shalom, dear friend.
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Dear Indira,
When we hold our newborns as young mothers I don’t think any of us has a clue what we signed up for. 😉 Thank you, my friend.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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🙂
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‘A mixture of pride and something other than joy floods Elise as her admirers kiss her cheek and leave. She sinks to her knees under the weight of her adult daughter’s scathing words, spewed in anger the night before. Her accusations haunt Elise and reduce her to ash.
“I’m such a failure.” ‘
That is just such powerful writing, Rochelle; there are so many strong negative images piled one on top of the other. I was genuinely shocked by it.
Shalom
Penny
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Dear Penny,
You are an intuitive lady. Thank you for your comments, both on and off the grid. ❤
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Nothing stings as deep as disparaging words from those we love.
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So true, Kat. Thank you for coming by.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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My pleasure. 😊
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Perception and reality can often be different. Trappings of success can be very visible but who knows what pain they mask. Nice one.
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Dear Subroto,
We all wear some kind of mask don’t we? Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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How sad. Even though she is successful in her work, her relationship with her daughter is not good.
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Dear Colline,
Our children have lived with us. They ‘know’ more about us than most, don’t they? At least they think they do. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Through time I’ve learned to be kind. (Wouldn’t you think you’d just BE that way?) When I find out what others are going through I thank my lucky stars that my path through life is easy in comparison. My WTF moments are now few and far between. You showed that beautifully in your story.
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Dear Lish,
Some people do make it hard to be kind, don’t they? At any rate, thank you for your lovely comments on my story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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No one ever knows what a person is truly thinking or feeling.
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True story Ellen. So lovely to see you here. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I don’t always comment. 🙂
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i guess you can’t win them all. the daughter has to grow up fast.
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Thank you for stopping by, Plaridel.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I guess everyone learns what true success is, eventually. Sometimes too late.
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Dear Fatima,
It’s always easiest to point to the other person’s success. As they say, the other man’s grass is always greener. Thank you for reading and commenting.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Parents are the first superheroes any kid would have in their lives. It will indeed be a mighty fall when you fall from that exalted position in your kid’s lives. No other accomplishment will even begin to fill that crater. Fantastic story, Rochelle. Loved it.
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Dear Varad,
Truer words were never spoken. Thank you for your lovely comment.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Packed with contrasting emotions and Elise’s inner turmoil. External trappings of success can never make up for the family relationships we struggle with. Children often don’t comprehend the pain they cause until they becomes parents themselves, but that’s no excuse. Well told.
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Dear Sarah Ann,
Too often, by the time the adult child comprehends, it’s too late. Thank you for your kind comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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A powerful story, Rochelle. Success, I guess, is a relative term then. Sad.
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Dear Piyali,
I think success is different things to different people. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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We never know what another person is truly going through. It makes no difference how successful you are, relationships are difficult for everyone who is honest. The words of a child hurled in anger are the ones that hurt the worst. Your wording is very accurate, “Her accusations haunt Elise and reduce her to ash.” Elise can’t enjoy her success when the relationship with her daughter is strained. Hopefully, there will be reconciliation. It’s hard to feel joy or satisfaction when pain is paramount in our hearts. I’ve felt “reduced to ash” by my own grown daughter; we love each other dearly but occasionally get into arguments that sting. The key is forgiveness and holding on to the knowledge that underneath it all we are confident of the love we have for each other. Sorry to ramble on. I sincerely enjoyed your story and it was thought-provoking as always. Have a nice weekend! =)
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Dear Brenda,
Thank you for your warm, affirming comments. Elise needs to read them. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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What a contrast between how the world sees her and how she sees herself. A touching story and a good reminder that we never know what someone else is going through.
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Dear Magarisa,
I wonder if anyone sees him or herself the way the world perceives? Thank you for your kind comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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An excellent point. You’re most welcome, Rochelle.
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There’s a much longer story revealed in those few words. My imagination will be working hard to fill in the gaps.
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Dear Patrick,
When one only has 100 words to work with. 😉 Thank you for stopping by.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Wonderfully powerful.
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Many thanks, Lisa.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Though I missed posting this week I was drawn to read the tales. Yours shows us looks are deceiving we know not what lurks beneath composure. 😔
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Dear Ellen,
Looks are definitely deceiving. 😉 Thank you for reading and commenting. 😀
Shalom,
Rochelle
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You are welcome.
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Does success come at a heavy price for Elise??? You can’t be successful in all domains.
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Dear Anshu,
One has to ask if it’s worth the price. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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It’s me. I’m in https://wordpress.com/post/onetahayes.com/15191
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Hope you read and liked my story. 😉
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Oh… such pain in that last section. One harsh word undercuts such compliments. It is so true though. I really understood the heart of this piece
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Dear Laurie,
There are no guarantees with parenthood and no instruction manuals for raising another human are there? No one can wound like an adult child. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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