The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit.
Genre: Hysterical Fiction
Word Count: 100
THINK TANK
“The things we take for granted,” said Shelley. “Who amongst us doesn’t ascend the porcelain throne upon arising? Wipe. Flush. Ready to face the day.”
“Run for cover.” Russell rolled his eyes. “The history faucet’s a-fixin’ to spout.”
“Do you know who invented toilet paper?”
“No, but I bet you’re gonna to tell me.”
Shelley took a deep breath. “Joseph Gayetty in 1857. He introduced it as ‘Medicated Paper.’
“Great Scott!”
“Precisely! The Scott brothers marketed their ScotTissue in 1879. Although Seth Wheeler patented his version in 1891.
“Well, everybody poops.” Russell snorted. “One could say they saved our butts.”
*
*
*
Rochelle Wisoff-Fields-Addicted to Purple 
Even though this story went down the toilet, it shines brightly. I can imagine this being a really fun conversation with Russell. What I can’t imagine is what life would be like without TP. Missing the Friday Fictioneer family.
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Dear Fatima,
And the Friday Fictioneers family has missed you.
Some of the descriptions of what came before TP makes me grateful. 😉 Your kind comments made my cheeks flush. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Well…you got me doing all kinds of research here this morning! Who knew…and now I know all kinds of things!…softest leaves n all..
Really like the style this was written in, but it is YOUR genre, bringing forward snippets of history like this, no-one can touch it. I know, because I thought about it, much tougher than it looks here.
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Dear Ain,
What a glowing comment. Thank you so much for your kind words. I do enjoy history. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Fun story, Rochelle. Someone once defined civilisation as the distance we put between ourselves and our excreta.
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Dear Neil,
And these days the excreta is hitting the rotating device all over the place, isn’t it? Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Teehee! What a clever way to smuggle in another history lesson! I guess before paper they used a cloth or sponge…not sure I want to go there…
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Dear Penny,
I’m grateful to live in the day of TP. I can’t imagine using…well, you know. 😉 Thank you. 😀 Your validating comments are always appreciated.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Before this grand invention, everyone wiped themselves with their left hands. Thats why everyone shakes hands only with the right hand still today.
Great story, Rochelle.
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Dear Mason,
I repeat. Glad to live in the days of toilet tissue. 😉 Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Me too! and you’re welcome.
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Dear Rochelle,
Only you could turn this image into a history lesson! And you do it so beautifully. I’m thinking the convo between you and Russell woulda had more poop jokes incorporated, though 😉
Shalom and lotsa soft and clean love,
Dale
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Dear Dale,
Well, Russell actually gave me a little book a while back entitled “What’s Your Poo Telling You.” Science and humor. So he seemed the perfect person to have the conversation with. 😉 Of course I only had 100 words. I shared the story with Kent the other night and he fell off his chair laughing. Little boys never outgrow potty humor do they?
Thank you for your affirming comments.
Shalom and lotsa soft and gentle hugs,
Rochelle
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Well there you go! See? I knew it and yes, he is the perfect person to have this conversation with! Boys and their toilet humour…
😉
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🥸🤪🤣
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Had to go on my phone to see these emojis! LOL
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Last year gave new meaning to “living on three squares a day.” Personally, I’d like to meet the guy who can actually do that.
I wouldn’t wanna shake his hand, but …
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Cuzzin’ Shelley went far …
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Dear Cuzzin Kent,
Tanks for the comment even though it came through as a UFO. It brings up all kinds of images I can’t unsee. Thank you for that. I’m flushed. Coffee time.
Shalom,
Cuzzin Shelley
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Anytime — usually.
And, Dale, you’re right about the humor — men will be boys.
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I’m glad you finally got some use out of that book. There’s also a companion book on your pee. I’ll see if I can find you a copy of that one as well.
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lol. A friend’s first job was working at a large city’s waste water treatment plant – he used that same reasoning about job security, everyone poops…. Anyway, some inventions are bigger than others, but few better than this, though a bidet might be fine in climates that don
‘t see -20 F 😉
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Dear Trent,
A positive attitude is everything. 😉 Job security indeed. 😀 Glad I made you laugh. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Boy, no subject is is safe with you concerning a history lesson. But, nobody does it better than you. Now, for everyone’s enlightenment, the paper roll goes over the TOP. Not the bottom. See…it’s in the patent. Good job M’Luv.
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Dear Jan,
Everything has a history, even the stinkiest subjects. 😉 Despite the patent picture, I’m sure the under/over debate will roll on. Thank you, M’luv.
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Well, it beats newspaper or the Sears catalogue :). I can only imagine the stories this picture is going to generate!
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Dear Linda,
I knew I was taking a chance posting this one. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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All in good fun :). I never knew what it was to grow up without an indoor bathroom, but my Colorado grandparents didn’t have one until I was about 10. I was delighted to know there would be no more late-night treks to the outhouse, terrified of snakes, or grasshoppers landing on me. Biggest, fattest grasshoppers you ever saw! Memories of the outhouse 🙂
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The closest thing I remember to that was being in Girl Scouts when we went camping. I was always glad to get back to the porcelain throne and reading room. 😉
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Ah, before the TP, there was a the Sears Catalogue and the daily paper … The information on the latter sometimes all that’s fit to print, and other times … fit for wiping backsides … 😉
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Na’ama Y’karah,
You make a good point. Perhaps we should read the toilet paper and wipe with the newspaper. 😉
Shalom and Hag Hanukkah Samayakh,
Rochelle
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LOL!!!!! I love the idea! The TP will be a better read! 😉
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Great picture and as someone who had to unblock a toilet this morning, timely too. After the 2020 toilet paper crisis, I think we are all extra grateful to the gentlemen in your story.
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Dear Jen,
There’s nothing worse than a clogged toilet. Takes me back to the day when my two-year-old son flushed all of his brother’s Star Wars action figures.
We had to settle for a “less-than” TP during the crisis. At least it wasn’t the newspaper. 😉 Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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If my dream of time machine travel ever comes to pass (pun intended) I’ll be sure to take some rolls along. They did indeed save our butts! Great story, Rochelle.
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Dear Lisa,
In my opinion, puns should always be intended. 😉 Thank you. 😀
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Rochelle, lol. You’re most welcome 🙂
Shalom,
Lisa
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They created history! Important invention 🙂
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Very important. 😉 Thank you, Anita.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
I wonder if either of them dreamt that one day a Mr. Whipple would be “secretly” squeezing their invention for thrills or that during a viral “crisis” the first thing people would hoard would be their veritable butt-wipers? Would they weep in despair or laughter?! Or both!
Shalom uv’rachah,
Dora
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Dear Dora,
One has to wonder what the inventors would think of today’s TP issues. 😉 Good questions. 😀
Shalom u’vrachah,
Rochelle
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You history guru, you! Nice one.
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Thank you so much, Trish. 😀
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Butt seriously, folks, November 19 was WTD World Toilet Day. https://www.un.org/en/observances/toilet-day
Since finding out about WTD I have been getting my paper from Who Gives A Crap because they donate some of their profits towards providing sanitation for those in need. Everybody poops but more people worldwide have a cell phone than have a place to go.
https://us.whogivesacrap.org/?utm_source=adwords&utm_medium=paid_search&utm_campaign=1024047963&utm_content=50759013539&utm_term=who%20gives%20a%20crap&gclid=Cj0KCQiA15yNBhDTARIsAGnwe0VOdIimw0E4YAVF2oao8XhYynPGYiaTKSAwRU6XheqBM6EKf1KjaWUaApJgEALw_wcB
I’ll bet this is something we all thought about when the tp hoarding was at it’s extreme in those early days of you know what.
Cool photo of a unique double seater and yes, thank you Rochelle for a fun history lesson.
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Dear Dede,
I had no idea. Thank you for the informative and fun links. TP is something we take for granted until our supply is threatened. Thank you for your encouraging comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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What a history lesson. I’ve actually wondered about what came before the TP, because all these fantasy stories set in medieval settings… they never mention these basic things.
Apparently people used corn cobs, stones, clay shards, sticks with a sponge, leaves, moss. The latter seems to me the most appealing.
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Dear Gabi,
I can’t imagine using corn cobs. I guess people did what they had to do, but…ugh! Who ever thought of the necessary things when reading fairy tales? 😉 Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Oh you did it again, Rochelle.
TP has become an essential even for wilderness backpackers, a survival item during pandemics, and there are shortage panics on remote islands. We have become such softies. 🙂
Peace,
Bill
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Dear Bill,
Talk about softies. During the pandemic, I complained about the rough off brand we were forced to buy. Guilty as charged. Thank you 😀
Shalom,
Rochelle
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😊
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Dear Mrs. Whipple W(T)F,
Just think how many Sears & Roebuck catalogs were saved by the invention of toilet paper, not to mention the indignity suffered by millions of corncobs over the years.
My mother’s maiden name was Scott, but unfortunately she was not related to the TP tycoons. Isn’t that a slap in the behind.
I suppose next week you’ll tell us who invented the rectal thermometer and why. I guess I’m not the only one who delves into crude, juvenile humor. 🙂
Enjoy the Go,
Blue Charmin Bear Family
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Dear Blue Charmin Bear and Family,
Hm…who did invent the rectal thermometer. You might regret the suggestion. 😉 I mean gadget or gizmo had to start somewhere, right? Of course, right. No ifs ands or butts.
I wonder if there was ever a kerfuffle about which way to use a corn cob. Do you use the end or in between? Why not? We argue over weighty matters like whether the TP should be rolled over the top or…
Thank you for checking in. I look forward to the Charmin bear commercials. Nothing like a cartoon that discusses things we’d never have talked about 60 years ago. I mean the networks were up in arms because the Cleaver’s bathroom actually had a toilet!!!!
Shalom,
Mrs. Whipple W(T)F
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I bet you have similar conversations all the time!
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Dear Liz,
It depends on who I’m talking to. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Interesting view that the politicians usually dump on us………..
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True story, Di.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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i didn’t expect toilet paper has been around that long. anyway, some folks still make use of newspaper as a substitute.
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Dear Plaridel,
I must say I’m happy that by the time I was born, toilet paper was a commonplace necessity. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Laughing a little too hard at “saved our butts.” Not sure how to respond to the prompt this week. How can I possibly “top” this one? So to speak.
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Dear Anne,
I’m glad my story made you laugh. 😀 Thank you for your generous comment.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Ha, fun! I always find it strange to think of someone actually inventing something we take so much for granted. I always think “wasn’t it always, just, well, there!? 🙂
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Dear Ali,
I agree. TP is one of the things we do take for granted. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Well told and informative. I lived on a farm and wee had an outhouse where newspaper was cut into square sheets.
I wonder what the world did for the 1000 of years before toilet paper was used?
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Dear James,
Wondering what people 1000 years ago takes some of the enchantment out of ancient history, doesn’t it?
On the upside, your newspapers never went to waste, did they? Oh wait. Yes they did. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thank you.
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I was distracted last week and run out of time to participate. Sorry. I’ll try this week.
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Life is what happens while we’re busy making other plans. I completely understand, James. That’s usually when I pull out a rerun. 😉
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It never occurred to me that someone invented it! Like James, I remember having to use scraps of newspaper in my old aunt’s outside toilet.
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Dear Keith,
At the very least, you had something to read in the bathroom before it went to waste. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Hi Rochelle, on the subject of loo paper, I could write a thesis 🙂
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Dear Michael,
I would be interested in reading that thesis. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Light hearted take on personal hygiene. You’ve shined a light on a little known fact Rochelle,
Thanks you !
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Dear Francine,
Glad you enjoyed my story. 😀 Thank you for your kind words.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Bahahaha all of these puns!
Love it. Gave me a good chuckle.
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Dear Laurie,
Sometimes you gotta play it for laughs. 😀 Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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