29 April 2022

Published April 27, 2022 by rochellewisoff

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The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit.

PHOTO PROMPT © Ted Strutz

Genre: Historical Fiction/Excerpt from Work in Progress
Word Count: 100 of 16,500

CHILDHOOD LOST

Schoolboys cavorted along the cobblestone street, shoving and teasing each other after a day of boring lessons. Peter missed being one of them.

Papa approached with determined strides, head held high, and a scowl on his black-bearded face. Like the Red Sea’s parting, the children made a path for him.

Peter turned from the window and hunched over his book.

Taking rolls from the oven, Mama clutched her rounded belly. “Son, come help me.”

He rose and took the pan from her, breathing in the yeasty aroma.

Papa burst through the door. “Peter! Lazy oaf. Get back to your lessons.”

© Rochelle Wisoff-Fields


66 comments on “29 April 2022

  • Dear Rochelle,

    I enjoyed reading this slice of life. The characters came to life and I can just imagine Papa’s forbidding countenance. I loved the line about the Red Sea parting. Poor Peter. He longed to be with his friends and he got into trouble for helping his mother. Maybe Papa was brought up by a strict father too and this is why he is the way he is. Wonderful story. I hope to read more.

    Shalom,
    Adele

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Adele,

      With two manuscripts languishing in a drawer, I don’t know where this one will go. But I’ve felt the need to get back to writing something longer than 100 words. Your comments concerning my characters encourage me to keep at it. Thank you so much.

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Like

  • Poor Peter. Socialization is a much needed experience for children. It helps them normalize and associate with people. It sounds like Peter is missing out on that aspect of life. What can be the outcome? We wonder. Good story.

    Liked by 1 person

  • I feel sorry for Peter every which-way. I also feel sorry for Peter’s mother. I have a feeling there were a lot of such bullies in the old days — and some still around in modern times. Sad story, well-written, Rochelle.

    Liked by 1 person

  • Come on, Peter. Get it together.

    Patience and understanding might be good lessons for dad, but that is of course entirely up to the author. I see a long, bumpy road ahead for Peter. Good start, Rochelle. In only 100 words, we already have a feel for Peter and his hardships.

    Liked by 1 person

  • I already like the boy and his mum, and dislike the father. There were–and still are–far too many of that type around. Please don’t kill mum and son off in your novel, which I’m looking forward to read. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  • Papa is starting off from a low base here, Rochelle. Unfortunately, this scene has more realism especially for the setting than you would like. Hope he overcomes his start in life.
    Well done and best wishes,
    Rowena

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Rowena,

      As far as where the characters and the novel goes, I’m putting one foot in front of the other and allowing the muse to speak. Sadly, there are too many family dynamics like this. Thank you.

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

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