WELCOME TO FRIDAY FICTIONEERS.
As always, writers are encouraged to be as innovative as possible with the prompt and 100 word constraints.
Henry David Thoreau said it best.
“It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.”
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THE CHALLENGE:
Write a one hundred word story that has a beginning, middle and end. (No one will be ostracized for going over or under the word count.)
THE KEY:
Make every word count.
THE RULES:
- Copy your URL to the Linkz collection. You’ll find the tab following the photo prompt. It’s the little white box to the left with the blue froggy guy. Click on it and follow directions. This is the best way to get the most reads and comments.
- MAKE SURE YOUR LINK IS SPECIFIC TO YOUR FLASH FICTION. (Should you find that you’ve made an error you can delete by clicking the little red ‘x’ that should appear under your icon. Then re-enter your URL. (If there’s no red x email me at Runtshell@aol.com. I can delete the wrong link for you).
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- Make note in your blog if you’d prefer not to have constructive criticism.
- REMINDER: This page is “FRIDAY FICTIONEERS CENTRAL” and is NOT the place to promote political or religious views. Also, you are responsible for the content of your story and policing comments on your blog. You have the right to delete any you consider offensive.
**Please exercise DISCRETION when commenting on a story! Be RESPECTFUL.**
Should someone have severe or hostile differences of opinion with another person it’s my hope that the involved parties would settle their disputes in private.
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My story will follow the prompt for those who might be distracted by reading a story before writing their own . I enjoy your comments.
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- To post the prompt to your page simply right click on the picture and then left click “Save image as…” This will download it to your computer. Then paste it into your blog page. Please respect the copyright and use it only for Friday Fictioneers purposes. Any other usage requires permission from the photographer. Thank you.
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Genre: Literary Fiction
Word Count: 99
CHILDHOOD’S END
“Tell me about your childhood.” Audrey tapped her pencil against her cheek and pierced me with her eyes.
I squirmed into a fetal position in my chair. “Bicycles, Barbies and circus clowns.”
“Why are you starving yourself to death?”
“I eat.” I counted the knots in the carpet.
“Popcorn and celery. 85 pounds and dropping. What have you buried?”
“Nothing. I remember my childhood in detail.”
“You invented it.”
To make her prying stop, I shut my eyes. In one heart-stopping moment, long dormant memories stirred and shattered my perfect life.
“The first one was my uncle,” I whispered.
The song’s intro is kind of long but it begged to be included.
Boy, this is a first! Wish I could whip out a quick 100.
I like yours, Rochelle. As hard a job that would be to be a therapist, the reward when someone starts to break through and talks must be very rewarding.
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p.s. ‘Childhoods End’ indeed… just when they are being children.
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Dear Ted,
I don’t understand the kind of animal that would do such a thing to a child. Not only does it rob her of her childhood, but can take her soul as well. I have high praises for a few therapists I’ve known.
Thanks for commenting.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I just don’t get it either. Those kids lives are ruined.
Hey, guess what?
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Oops. Your link’s not working, Ted. Did you copy the wrong URL?
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Thanks, try it now. WordPress has been weird lately and not publishing on the first try, then it does, then reverts back to an older version or just disappears.
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😉
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Okay… I’m steamed! Crying foul too… wouldn’t you just know it… Kent! Advance notice I’d say… what’s that called when family gets special treatment??? I’m surprised MacIlroy didn’t post yesterday.
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Mr. MacIlroy’s retired. 😉
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Really… we’ll have to write a fire… maybe some Tiki Torches.
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😉 he would’ve wanted it that way.
Still, your link isn’t working, Ted.
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Wow… I’m getting it when I click.
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I’ll try again.
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Okay, there it is. WordPress must be sleeping this morning.
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They’ve been sleeping all day for me. I had trouble with a Trifecta post earlier.
Hey… what are you doing up so late? I’m going to bed.
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Ha. This is my wake up and write time. I got to bed way earlier. I’m blissfully out of step with most of the region.
Pleasant dreams, Ted.
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Dear Rochelle,
Thank you for sharing this story with us. You never know how moving through and eventually past the pain can help someone else save a life down the road. Good writing can do that. You do that.
Aloha,
Doug
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Dear Doug,
One thing I hope I’ve learned is how to share experience, strength and hope. Your words make me smile.
Many mahalos.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Yoyr story is very heartbreaking. She is just the tip of the iceberg, many victims of sexual abuse remain silent.
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Dear Patricia,
That is the heartbreaking part. Too many are silent, whether from shame or from,burying the memories.
Thank you for commenting.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I know several people who have undergone this trauma. It is sick that some people would do it. You have captured the essence of the victim very well.
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Dear Alastair,
I, too, know some victims. Childhood trauma can be more debilitating than Cancer. Thank you for your comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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great story…. but I’m sorry but I don’t get the connection with the prompt unless there wasn’t supposed to be one for you this week or I’m too thick (don’t answer that) to see it.
Happy Wednesday on Friday (or verse visa). Randy
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A glancing reference to the prompt. “Bicycles, Barbies and circus clowns.”
In any case, glad you liked the story, Randy. I like you anyway…in thickness and in health.
Shalom
Rochelle
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I love that line, Rochelle “In thickness or in health” 🙂
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Hi Rochelle, Shattering experience for the child and a loss of childhood. Therapists like these carry out a commendable service to the society, countering the damage caused by a few people.
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Dear Night,
A good therapist is worth is or her weight in gold. I’ve had the good fortune of knowing a few. Thank you for commenting and understanding.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Sensitively crafted dialogue about something that’s all too common these days. Or did it always go on and it just never came out into the open… Well done Rochelle.
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Dear Sandra,
I fear that this type of thing is as old as human beings. I believe there’s more light shed on it now. All too many little victims are threatened in some way or another if they tell. And grown ups are always right, aren’t they?
Thank you for your kind words.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Utter tragedy. Just utter tragedy. The world still has a long way to go. When I was a teenager I took a baseball bat to the car, front door and face of the father of my girlfriend, who whispered about that awful happening to me, how it had happened to her. I was rightfully locked up a short while. He got away scot-free. I would do worse to him now, but these days I think he would get arrested more easily. Powerful piece.
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Dear Managua,
You have a powerful story of your own. Thank you for having the courage to share.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Too often, it’s a member of the family who does the abusing so the memories are part of her (or his) everyday life. Horrible. Good story, Rochelle, but can the damage ever be undone?
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Dear VB,
No. I don’t believe the damage can be undone. What I believe is that we can have beauty for ashes in facing the abuse and moving on. The memories don’t go away and learned reactions can be unlearned or overcome. Not to mention once accepted and dealt with these memories can be used as grist for the writer’s mill. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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What a great treatment of such a tragic and sensitive subject. Wonderful, heart-breaking dialogue. As an elementary school teacher, the idea that someone would or could harm any of my students (or any child) makes me sick and makes me want to do violent things.
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Dear David,
Your strong reaction is the best compliment you can give this writer. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I agree with the other commenters that you handled this delicately and well. Your story suggests of horrors endured and their consequences, and through this is heart-wrenchingly sad. Us readers can only hope that Audrey with her piercing eyes can help the narrator.
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Dear Dave,
Thank you for your kind and insightful comments. I believe Audrey helped the narrator more than she knows.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I can think of no justification from any adult to do something so hideous. I love children the right way and celebrate them and their youth. I am not sure what I would do if I ever came in contact with someone who hurt a child close to me. Let’s just say and eye for an eye might come into play!
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Dear Joe,
Your words warm my heart. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Ah Rochelle! You hit it out of the ballpark again! Your descriptions of body language added such depth! And that last line is tragic.
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Dear Linda,
Many thanks for your encouraging words.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Ouch, this story came from nowhere but painting the most vivid pictures with the fewest words.
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Dear Jen,
It didn’t really come out of nowhere. It came from a deep place inside and a conversation that said I had to write the story. I’m planning on a blog in the near future to possibly elaborate if I can find the right words.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Hi Rochelle,
I meant it as a compliment, I assure you. You have a way of taking the picture prompts and carrying me a million miles from wherever I start. Your stories, more than probably any others, epitomize the concept of using the picture as inspiration, but then letting the story fly. I’m in awe. And if you find the time / strength (because these topics, whether fictional or otherwise, take courage to write about) / words to post that blog, I’ll be sure to read it.
Best
Jen
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Dear Jen,
While I enjoy the extended compliment I wanted to make sure you know that I take your first comment as anything other than a compliment.
I am contemplating a blog either this week or next explaining how I’ve arrived at some of my stories. Time is a major deterrent at the moment. .And you hit the nail squarely on the head with you comment about strength and courage. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Super story! Especially that ending. Are you going to write more or was that part of one of your short stories? Seemed familiar.
It happened again, you know. You went serious, I went funny.
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(signed)
wmqcolby from another computer)
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Dear Kent,
Yes, I can see where it would seem familiar. Another facet of a longer story. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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this is such a heartbreaking tale… but you’re such a brilliant storyteller. the title’s just perfect!
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Dear KZ,
Thank you so much for your sweet words.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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That made my stomach clench … well done.
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Deare Elen,
Many thanks.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Rochelle,
This was wonderful, but I wonder what it might take to make you laugh, when a clown in a piano brings out a story about child molestation? (Just teasing, darling — your writing is powerful, but on a very sad run…)
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Dear Helena,
I agree, my last couple of stories have been dark. I can’t explain why a certain prompt sends me in one direction or another. I pretty much listen to my muse voices and go where they tell me.
Actually I laugh at a lot of things. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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This powerful story is yet another reminder of how blessed most of us are and that we often don’t know what lies behind the seemingly perfect lives of some of those around us. This is, as always, well-written, heartfelt and heart-rending, but I was thinking the same thing as Helena. Perhaps something a bit more upbeat soon, just for a change. 🙂
janet
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Dear Janet,
Some of us are better at putting on the clown face than others. 😉 I promise you an upbeat story for next week…if my muse allows. I only write what the voices in my head tell me.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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This was a powerful piece, Rochelle. Stunning, eloquent, heart-breaking.
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Thank you, Lisa.
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Heart-wrenching story Rochelle! I like the way you built the dialogue until this last sentence.
I am a Pink Floyd fan too. 🙂
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Many thanks for your compliments, Hannah.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thank you Rochelle. This story too true for all ages, many adults who buried memories now find them resurfacing. Clever with the clown reference, for all of us, a moment of memory can release the hidden secrets (and abuse) that had been kept inside for too long. Well done. Your last sentence whispers the pain held inside with a roar!
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Dear Penny,
I’m happy that someone finally mentioned the clown reference. It’s amazing that a person can bury such trauma so deeply until one day a word, a song or a smell can bring it all flooding to the surface. Thank you for your kind words.
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Rochelle — I did something I never do this week — I read yours first. Before I wrote mine. Which I never do. Never.
SOOOOO…. I’m just going to say that your post made me very angry at child molesters, and that’s where my ugly story came from.
So, it’s your fault.
(no, I’m just a horrible human being, I know….)
Great story, as always. You know how to tug on the emotions, that’s for sure.
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Dear H. Ken,
Since I read your story in all it’s well written ugliness, I’m not sure if I want to accept the blame. 😉 However the fact that my story evoked such strong emotion is the highest compliment you could give me.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I find it so curious that this is where you went from the prompt. As always, it’s a wonderful 100 words even if the subject matter is disturbing.
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Dear Dawn,
You’ll note a glancing reference to clowns in the line, “Bicycles, Barbies and circus clowns.” See I used the prompt and jumped off from there. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Of course!
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dark piece. I shake my head at the insanity of humanity. Who could do such a thing to a child?
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Unfortunately, too many would and have done such things to children. It is dark. It’s where my head went this week. Might try to lighten up next week. But it’s how we writers are. We hear voices and then do what the voices tell us.
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Dear Rochelle,
I’m speechless. Fantastic story. I think my heart skipped a beat or two. I can completely identify with your main character. Sad that so many men and women can.
Always,
Renee
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Dear Renee,
It saddens me that you can relate to this story in anyway, shape or form. There are too many silent victims. Thank you for your kind words and compliments.
shalom,
Rochelle
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I guess that’s why I put it out there. I don’t want to be silent about it. If my comments or stories help one person, then I’ve done the right thing by speaking out.
Always,
Renee
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Dear Rochelle,
Nicely inter woven story. I think I identify with the clown being a freaky memory of anyone’s past. And then to lead to a much deeper and darker place…well done. I’m speechless, too.
Amy
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Dear Amy,
For some clowns represent something besides circus performers. Thank you for you kind words.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Rochelle, emotional and definitely unexpected. Such a contrasting story to the funny picture. Skillfully written, you packed a punch in 99. Peace 🙂
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Dear Shainbird,
Thank you for your kind comments.
shalom,
Rochelle
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After reading many of the other comments here I begin to fear there’s something wrong with me. I simply didn’t get the reference to paedophilia. In fact I thought the final line of the story was funny. Clearly it’s her uncle who is stuck in the piano – the first event in a life of traumatic memories as the child of circus performers.
Thank you for using my photo.
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Dear John,
I’m hoping your comment is tongue in cheek and you didn’t really think her uncle was stuck in the piano. No doubt she would like to have put him there.
Thank you for sharing the photo. A lot of interesting stories came from it.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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You handled this subject very well. The line, “I counted the knots in the carpet” was especially telling. Thankfully, she’s getting some help.
– Alvin Argyle
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Dear Alvin,
Thank you for your comments. It is good that she sought help. 😉
Shalom,
Susie S.
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Powerful story Rochelle, there is so much in the media about this abuse at the moment – in the UK there are cases going back decades and only just coming to light – not to mention the cases of Local Authority homes, and Catholic priests. It’s sickening, but we all need to hear it. Good story.
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Dear Trudy,
This is definitely one of my personal soap boxes. Too much has been hidden behind bedroom doors and swept under moth-eaten carpets. Thank you coming by with your comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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So not the obvious! This speaks to me in a strange kind of way. But then, that’s therapy for you!
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Dear Freya,
If there’s anything I dislike, it’s being obvious. 😉 Therapy, if the therapist is worth his or her salt, is a wonderful thing. One never knows what will speak. I’m pleased to know that my story is that for you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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It is incredibly unfortunate that not every victim has an Audrey.
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Dear MIss Kz,
I agree. Thank you for commenting.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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poor child. I hope nothing so horrific ever touched your life. A great tragedy it ever touches anyone. A fine piece of writing…
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Dear Bill,
Thank you for your kind comments.
shalom,
Rochelle
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A deep & dark subject to write about – an interesting leap from the prompt with shock ending!
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Dear Neens,
For whatever reason, this is how the prompt spoke to me. Thank you for commenting.
shalom,
Rochelle
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You once again make me feel bad about posting my own effort. This was perfection in its pain, its honesty, and (hopefully) soon to be realized redemption, Rochelle.
Peace,
t
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Dear Troy,
Ah always nice to read such high praise. However, you’ve no need to feel bad about your own story.
Healing and redemption begin with facing the pain with honest. I believe the MC will be able to do this.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Excellent. The music was a nice touch. Tender subject for so many …
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Thank you, Ann. Indeed it’s a subject that has touched way too many.
shalom,
Rochelle
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horror stories don’t tend to create such a shock for me.. as do such tales that reflect and touch reality.. i can only pray and hope such a story doesn’t turn into a reality.. though i know many are suffering such a fate sadly
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Dear Shreyank,
Unfortunately this type of story is much worse than any vampire tale because of the reality. Thank you for commenting.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Wow, great impact and as always, unexpected. Super job.
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Thank you, Perry. 😀
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Just came across this blog, what a wonderful concept! Your entry for last week was heartbreaking and lovely.
Actually, my blog is for an audiobook podcast that I run. I would love one week to read a small collection of the submissions to Friday Fictioneers on the podcast, if you (and the other writers) would let me. You can hop over to Telling of Tales if you want to see what I do. 🙂
All the best, will definitely be following your blog from now on.
– Magnus
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Dear Magnus,
I took a quick jog to your blog and I’m honored that you would ask. I can only speak for myself. Feel free to peruse back through my blog for other stories they go back to April 12, 2012. I started Friday Fictioneers as a tenuous flash fiction beginner and ended up taking on the whole shebang. Sometimes truth is stranger than fiction.
Hope to connect with you soon.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Hello,
It would be interesting to collaborate at some point. You could, for example, let those who would respond know one week that I would choose ten shorts to read on the podcast, if they’ve added a quick line to say “yes, I consent to having my story read” or something to that effect.
I could also go through your archive and pick the ones of your own that stick out to me. It would be a pleasure to read your words. 🙂
– Magnus
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Wow – powerful – and an unexpected take on the prompt. Well done – but then, that’s a given.
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Dear Erin,
Hate to be predictable. .Thank you for your compliments.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Emotive not melodramatic. The whole story is there in your words.
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Many thanks, Lindy. Your words are affirming.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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What a story, even stronger as I have learned a few bloggers with the same background… It’s o unberable sad. and that final line came as a hard hit to my guts…
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Dear Björn,
It’s a sad commentary, indeed, that so many relate to this story. Thank you your kind comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Your story made me flinch just a bit. Hits too close to home for me. But it is very well written as always.
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Dear Jackie,
I hate to hear that it hits close to home for you. It’s close to home for too many of us, isn’t it? thank you for commenting.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Another heartwrenching but beautifully written story, Rochelle! We know something’s terribly wrong as soon as she goes into a fetal position, but you keep us guessing all the way to “the first one…” – of how many? The poor girl.
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Dear Sharon,
The narrator would rather not say how many. It pleases me that you read the body language. Thank you for your kind words.
shalom,
Rochelle
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From your (great) story I got that the prompt was like an ostrich with its head buried and symbolised the victim’s handling of the abuse situation, but also was the trigger for the victim to release and reveal. And I don’t agree with others who believe that childhood abuse can never be healed. You’re only a victim if choose to see yourself as one. Thank goodness that times are changing and it is getting harder to get away with this sort of disgraceful conduct. Ann
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Dear Ann,
Thank you for your insightful comments. I agree. Childhood abuse can be healed, although not forgotten. In remembering and hard work the victim can overcome and emerge as the victor. I know this to be true.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Happy endings. Sort of. Sometimes they do occur outside of our works of fiction.
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P.S. Curiously, two evenings ago, I watched the film ‘The Pianist’, which was about a Polish Jewish concert pianist’s experiences during WWII. Based on a true story. Harrowing and compelling.
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i own that movie and the book. Beautifully done, one of my all time favorites. I cried when Adrien Brody received the Oscar for his stunning portrayal.
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I cried too. One of the most compelling aspects for me was how the hero, the pianist, was reduced to watching. His face (alone!) made it impossible for him to venture out and gain his ‘bread’. Oh, I could go on and on about this film and I’m not surprised about the Oscar.
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Wow. Unexpected and dark. How good this is.
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Many many thanks, Patrick.
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A sensitive subject well-handled, and the last line–“the first one was…”–the first one. Oh, my, how much that expresses.
Here’s mine: http://unexpectedpaths.com/friday-fictioneers/simon-sez/
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Dear Maggie,
Thank you so much for your kind comments.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Such a powerful and sensitive piece – the body language (squirming) so telling, showing up the avoidance of saying the words as a useless defence. And then, ‘The first one…’ You really weren’t pulling your punches this week. 🙂
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Dear Sarah,
All I can say to that is, “Thank you.”
shalom,
Rochelle
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your story, although fiction here, unfortunately lives in every culture around the world. pure evil. i just hope justice is made (here in this life or the next…) for the innocent ones that have a life stolen from them.
thank you. ♥
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Dear Sunshine,
I agree. Too much truth in this tale. Thanks for commenting.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Liked your take on Childhood’s End, Rochelle. I took an adult view of that photo even if the legs are obviously a child’s legs. The idea just popped into my head and I couldn’t go back to the spirit of the prompt after that.
Maddie Cochere of Breezy Books thought I might be able to exercise my grey cells by taking on the hundred word challenge,. I love it, but I need help, please. I am absolutely hopeless getting things set up. I thought I followed instructions, but I can’t set myself up in that link section where al the other stories are.
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I’ve just had a check and it worked after all. Must have been a fluke. I’m just too hopeless for words.
PS. Rochelle, I tend to speed read. I slowed down and re-read your story,. That last line really packs a punch.
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Dear Mary,
It seems that your link…both of them…worked just fine. Glad you liked my story. As you might have guessed, I used the prompt as a jumping off point, not an illustration of my story. So the legs in the piano are neither here nor there in Childhood’s End.
Happy to have you aboard. Going to read your story now.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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