WELCOME TO FRIDAY FICTIONEERS.
As always, writers are encouraged to be as innovative as possible with the prompt and 100 word constraints.
Henry David Thoreau said it best.
“It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.”
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THE CHALLENGE:
Write a one hundred word story that has a beginning, middle and end. (No one will be ostracized for going over or under the word count.)
THE KEY:
Make every word count.
THE RULES:
- Copy your URL to the Linkz collection. You’ll find the tab following the photo prompt. It’s the little white box to the left with the blue froggy guy. Click on it and follow directions. This is the best way to get the most reads and comments.
- MAKE SURE YOUR LINK IS SPECIFIC TO YOUR FLASH FICTION. (Should you find that you’ve made an error you can delete by clicking the little red ‘x’ that should appear under your icon. Then re-enter your URL. (If there’s no red x email me at Runtshell@aol.com. I can delete the wrong link for you).
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- Make note in your blog if you’d prefer not to have constructive criticism.
- REMINDER: This page is “FRIDAY FICTIONEERS CENTRAL” and is NOT the place to promote political or religious views. Also, you are responsible for the content of your story and policing comments on your blog. You have the right to delete any you consider offensive.
**Please exercise DISCRETION when commenting on a story! Be RESPECTFUL.**
Should someone have severe or hostile differences of opinion with another person it’s my hope that the involved parties would settle their disputes in private.
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- Like us on Facebook
- 😉 My story follows the photo and link tool. I enjoy comments and relish constructive criticism. 😀
- Shalom,
Rochelle
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Copyright – David Stewart
Special thanks to those who have contributed photos. I’m building up quite a library. And on that note, I have a request. Please when emailing your jpgs (some have sent more than four at once) put your name on it somehow. I’m not always the most organized nor do I have the best memory. So far I think all are named and accounted for. Thanks. Don’t stop sending them.
Genre: Literary Fiction
Word Count: 100
IN THE BALANCE
Cold metal ladder-rungs dug into Melinda’s bare feet. She shivered as icy wind tugged at her robe.
Like jetsam in a whirlpool, disjointed images swirled through her mind; anniversary flowers delivered in the morning followed by somber uniformed officers in the afternoon bearing unthinkable news. Her husband, Grant, dead—a sniper’s bullet.
No one left to live for; she stepped onto the roof and studied the rock-strewn ground below. Breath held, she inched toward the edge.
Suddenly, her unborn child kicked for the first time.
Melinda shrank back.
Grant’s voice whispered on the wind, “Take good care of our son.”
Hi Rochelle, it touched the heart. Sad but ending is great.
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Dear Indira,
Words such as yours are pleasant to wake up to in the early morning hours.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I enjoyed the ending too. The promise of a brighter future!
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Dear Gabriella,
There’s always hope for tomorrow, isn’t there? Although sometimes it’s hard to see under the circumstances. Just couldn’t let Melinda jump.
Thank you for your comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I am glad you didn’t let her jump!
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I’m glad Melinda found a reason to live after all. I enjoy stories with happy endings.
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Dear Kwadwo,
Glad you liked my story and it’s somewhat happy ending.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I can’t think of anything worse than getting word a loved one has been killed in such a situation. To see the military car pull up in front of your house. The mind-numbing pain and fear. What a marvellous ending.
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Dear Lyn,
Horrible experience. As soon as you see them, you know why they’ve come. My husband’s brother was killed overseas in 1974. It’s one of those things that remains indelibly etched in my memory.
Thanks for commenting and I’m glad you liked the ending.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Wonderfully crafted – again! One of the secrets is how many different levels you take your readers…I counted 4 little key extras, culminating in the whispering wind…beautiful, sad, and heartening.
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Dear Managua,
Can’t tell you how pleased I am that you picked up on the layers within the story. Thank you for seeing and commenting.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
The wind whispers to all of us. Trick is to listen close and pay attention. You are one who has stepped back from the edge and your readers are the ones to benefit. I loved ‘In the Balance’ and commend you for finding yours.
Aloha,
Doug
MMLHSD
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Hi Rochelle, AnElephantCant see the little boxes to link his story.
Sorry to be a nuisance, might be the laptop problem.
Can you add please?
Anelephantcant.me/2013/07/03/the-ladder-friday-fictioneers/
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Dear Elephant…I’m not sure I can add your link. I can try though.
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It appears I can and I did. 🙂
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Thank you, guess you can!
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Okay, read your story now, very powerful again.
You do like the old human dilemma, don’t you?
Great stuff.
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Dear Elephant,
I guess I do at that. We are multifaceted beings and I love to read stories that reflect that. So, in turn, I like to read them. Guess you could say I’m character driven…or a driven character. 😉
Thanks for commenting. Glad you liked it.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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A lot of story in your 100 words, Rochelle–very well told.
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Many thanks, VB. Nice to hear.
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Saved at the last second. I can see in the picture, the husband and/or son metaphorically climbing desperately up to reach her in time. Great, touching story.
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Dear David,
Love the picture. And glad you like my story. Thank you for your kind words.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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One of those situations where either decision hurts
Lovely story
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Dear Moondust,
Indeed. A lot of pain no matter what. Thank you for your kind comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I think that she made the right decision… but a terrible situation indeed.
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Dear Björn,
I think she made the right decision, too. But hers won’t be an easy road.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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A way forward through the grief, nicely told.
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Happy to have you say so, Sandra. 🙂
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Hello – I’m finally getting back to a bit of Friday Fictioneer fun, and I am actually a little nervous! It’s been a long time, but thanks for continuing to host this. I’ve enjoyed seeing the photos and stories – even when I couldn’t participate. My comeback story is here:
http://kbnelson.wordpress.com/2013/07/03/for-better-or-worse-friday-fictioneers-100-word-story/
Thanks!
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Welcome back, Karen.
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When you feel alone there seems nothing worth living for. So glad the child kicked before she made the choice to jump instead of while she fell.
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Dear Joe,
I know there are reasons for everything in life. We can’t always see them at the time. Thanks for your comments.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Rochelle, I had a mis-start this morning — there was a glitch with my post (at position 18) and so I’ve re-posted (position 20). I wasn’t sure how to edit (or if I even could) so if you could kindly delete position 18 as it is a dead link, I would appreciate it!
On to read now…
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It started out so sad, but ended up being uplifting. Your story makes me wonder how many women through the ages have stood where she stood and felt what she felt. Thought-provoking as per your usual Rochelle. 😀
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Dear Linda,
No doubt, many women have felt this way. I remember when my sister-in-law came back from Turkey without Jerry. Very tough time. If it hadn’t been for their son…who knows?
Thank you for your comments.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Another heart-breaker from you, Rochelle. I’m certain she will decide to listen, but the road will not be an easy one for her. The first part is beautifully described – I liked the flotsam analogy too, although for a second it put me elsewhere than on a rooftop.
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Dear Jen,
I wanted you to go elsewhere with Melinda. So my mission is accomplished. Her mind is going ninety to nothing at that point and her thoughts are like tattered bits of paper, trying to grasp at a reason to live, yet not wanting to.
Thanks for your comments. I value them very much. Again, your story was stellar this week. Bravisimo!
Shalom,
Rochelle
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A wonderful story about a woman’s right to choose and making the right choice at the right time.
janet
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Dear Janet,
Thank you for commenting with such perception. 😉
shalom,
Rochelle
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Great story Rochelle. I like that.
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Glad you like it, Alastair.
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Phew, that was close! Thanks for bringing her back.
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Dear Dawn,
You can’t kill ’em all. 😉
shalom,
Rochelle
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😉
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Oh, that was… hmm… white knuckled there for a few. Glad you kept her alive, and I love that she heard his voice on the wind.
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Dear Buffy,
Nothing more gratifying to a writer than to know her story evoked such a strong reaction. Thank you.
shalom,
Rochelle
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fabulous emotional kicker at the end!
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Thanks Carrie. Happy to have kicked. 😉
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Soldiering on. Sometimes when we think we have choices we do not. And with help, we hope to make the right ones.
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Soldiering on. I like that.
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Sweet story.
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Thanks Lisa. Gave Angelique some time to rest. 😉
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Yup! Excellent!
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😀
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Hi Rochelle, What a great story, so much description in such a short piece. I don’t know how you do it.
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Dear JWD,
It’s a matter of holding my mouth in just the right position while I type…nah not really. Excuse my warped sense of humor. I don’t take your compliment lightly. Writing is my passion. Thank you
shalom,
Rochelle
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Here we go! http://starvingactivist.wordpress.com/2013/07/03/friday-fictioneers-5-july-2013-the-storm/
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Reminds me of Tennyson’s, ‘Home they brought her warrior dead’. She lives for her child now. A sad and a powerful tale
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Dear Nightlake,
Love the quote and the comparison. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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So sad, but a lovely ending to the tale. She has much joy waiting for her!!!
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Dear Jan,
Yes, I believe she does. Glad you liked my story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Rochelle…
Such a touching story…
I felt the pain…
Though conveyed through such limited words…
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Dear Loco,
High praise for a writer to know that I made a reader feel my character’s emotions. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochellel
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Ah Rochelle,
I see I’ve entered the world of white knuckles and sighs of relief !
Loved the unborn child making ts presence known, and the father too…
Your message that the voices and the love are there for us always is so uplifting
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Dear Valerie,
Your words uplift me. I’m pleased you came by and commented. Thank you.
shalom,
Rochelle
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always amazed by your stories. so much story, so much tension and so much emotion packed into a hundred words and still able to fit in great descriptions to set the scene. 🙂
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Dear KZ,
I’m always warmed by your comments. Hope you had a happy birthday.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Hi, Rochelle. I loved your intro material. And your story is so very well done. Had me snagged from word number one right through the last one.
And I really liked your story for the picture with the cat on the table. Powerful — and a true report of many similar lives destroyed.
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Dear Sandra,
Thank you for your comments…on both stories. “Final Declaration” is in the top five of my favorite flash fictions. (Don’t try to say that fast.). Glad you liked them.
shalom,
Rochelle
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You write such powerful stories. A death and an almost second death, saved by an imminent birth… you certainly pack in a lot in one hundred words!
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Dear Dave,
And I thank you for your powerful words of praise.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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The wind whispered to me also on one of my darkest days. The wind is very wise. Excellent story with a great ending. Have a wonderful 4th!
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Dear Jackie,
Glad you’ve heard those whisperings, too. Thank you for your kind words as well.
shalom,
Rochelle
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This is so powerful. Often, if we are in the right frame of mind to notice, we receive messages to keep going, even in our darkest moments. It is worth listening, for sure.
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Dear Freya,
I’m a firm believer that it’s in the deepest darkness that God sends the brightest light. thank for your kind words.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Very well done. The suspense was palpable.
Scott
Mine: http://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2013/07/03/friday-fictioneers-7313-a-remembrance-rated-pg13/
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Glad to hear, Scott.
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It’s a good thing her husband was watching from beyond. Her sorrow is understandable, but she bears her dead husband’s pride and joy. A bittersweet tale, very well told.
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Dear E. A.
Your comments are always so affirming. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Hi Rochelle, How and where to reach for others link to read their stories. Here is my link, I tried again- http://amaltaas.wordpress.com/2013/07/05/friday-fictioneers-2/
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The tone is pacey and the actions were swift! I enjoyed this story greatly!!!
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Many thanks, Charles.
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Fabulous use of the prompt. I loved the last line.
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Thank you so much, LInday.
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Busy week between volunteering, traveling, and the holiday. Celebrated my Country’s Birthday as well as my YankeeDoodle Fatherinlaw’s birthday. It’s not fair that he always gets fireworks and awesome music! Anyway, this weeks pic did serve as very inspirational for a scene for my current WIP that I’m writing for NanoCamp this month. It’s way longer than 100 words, but it’s yanked right out of memories from service. Thank you to all my fellow Veterans and Welcome home!
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How powerful. I have personal sympathy for this story — everything changes when something like that happens.
Fantastic story, darling.
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Dear Helena,
It does amaze me how one incident in a day can change a life’s course forever. Thank you for your high praise.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Not one word wasted. Perfect, Rochelle!
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Perfect is high praise. Thank you, Troy.
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Beautiful story, Niagara. The last line made me think of the Jimi Hendrix song, “The Wind Cries Mary,” or in this case, Melinda.
Hope you had an enjoyable Independence Day,
Harlan
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Dear Harlan,
One of my favorite songs. Now I’ll be humming it all day. It was a good Independence day, indeed. Glad you liked the story.
Shalom,
Niagara
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But when are you going to write us a musical comedy?!
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Dear Perry,
I’ll have t think about that. Why not? They made a musical lout of Les Miserable/
Shalom,
Rochelle
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What a lovely piece! There’s almost a melodic tone to it – or is that just me? All in all, very lovely done 🙂
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Dear Perry,
I’ll have t think about that. Why not? They made a musical lout of Les Miserable/
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Vittorria,
Thank you for your lovely compliments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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That’s the perfect reason to live.
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Dear Sonia,
I can’t think of a better reason. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Definitely step back! It’s the people who are left behind! Today in Manchester UK I noticed a Memorial Tree which listed the names of all the (Manchester) civilians killed in WW2 (mainly bombing as the Germans targeted all the heavy industry and the docks at the end of the Manchester Ship canal.)
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Dear Patrick,
Where war’s concerned, everyone’s lives are affected. Thank you for your comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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The best reason to step back from the brink. Nicely told tale.
Here’s mine: http://unexpectedpaths.com/friday-fictioneers/carpe-diem/
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Excellent story with only 100 words
Just did mine (and looking forward to doing more) http://wp.me/p1s8Rt-yK These writing challenges are fun 🙂
Ohhhh and Purple is my favorite color
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Dear Tena,
Welcome to Friday Fictioneers and thank you for your sweet words for my story. Glad to know another purple lover. 😉
Warning: FF is like eating pistachios. You can’t eat just one.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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These Writing Challenges ARE addicting 😉 (And OHHH so FUN). 😉
shalom
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I can see the sniper idea – a good one to spin off of and then the roof for the wife, but I don’t know, I think I would have preferred something else coming to mind to stop her. Like, “Oh gee, I promised to take mom to the seaside next week…”
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Dear Lindaura,
Somehow I feel that a bun in the oven trumps taking mom to the seashore/. 😉
Thanks for commenting. Hope things are looking up for you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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It’s perhaps the greatest of all mysteries, why we choose to go on living when we know that misery and suffering is certainly a part of what we can look forward to! We all come to stand on that edge one time or another. And there’s always a voice in the wind to pull us back, if we choose to hear it. I like your vocab: wind, whirlpool, swirled. I even saw the anniversary flowers being ripped from their stems and scattering in the wind, a kind of parallel for how she would have experienced the voice carrying the bad news.
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Dear Ann,
Reading your comments is almost as exciting as writing the story. I want to say “great visuals”. I feel a sense of accomplishment knowing that you saw what I wanted you to.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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great powerful story… written elegantly 🙂
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Humble thanks, Shreyank.
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Dear Rochelle,
Why do we get the feeling there is nothing left to live for when we lose love? Then comes that kick. It brings us back to ourselves and makes us realize that there is so much more for us to be thankful for. Good story and a good lesson too.
Always,
Renee
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Dear Renee,
Sometimes it’s hard to see past the circumstances, isn’t it? Despair is tough to overcome and rise above. Thank you for those kind words I write for.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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You’ve captured so many emotions in your story. I feel Melinda will be experiencing even more in the coming months after that timely kick.
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Dear Sarah Ann,
Fortunately I’ve not known Melinda’s pain firsthand. I can only imagine and am happy to know that I’ve captured those emotions for you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I was trying to add an inlinkz plugin to my blog post but I was not able to do so. I had chosen the non-dynamic script but it isn’t turning out to be the way it must. Since you are experienced with adding this plugin, would you please tell me which script do you use yourself?
Here is the link to my post-
http://howanxious.wordpress.com/2013/07/06/right2write-prompt-1-departing-sun/
Thanks.
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Dear Rochelle
I was so worried you were going to have her jump, then delighted with your ending. You got lots into this story, painted a beautiful picture.
Take care
Dee
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Dear Dee,
I’m happy you liked my story. I can’t make all endings sad ones. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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