WELCOME TO FRIDAY FICTIONEERS.
This is NOT the prompt! This is Friday Fictioneers creator Madison Woods on her wedding day, Sunday, September 22. A hearty congratulations to the happy couple.
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Now back to our regularly scheduled program. 😉
As always, writers are encouraged to be as innovative as possible with the prompt and 100 word constraints.
Henry David Thoreau said it best.
“It’s not what you look at that matters, it’s what you see.”
THE CHALLENGE:
Write a one hundred word story that has a beginning, middle and end. (No one will be ostracized for going a few words over the count.)
THE KEY:
Make every word count.
THE RULES:
- Copy your URL to the Linkz collection. You’ll find the tab following the photo prompt. It’s the little white box to the left with the blue froggy guy. Click on it and follow directions. This is the best way to get the most reads and comments.
- MAKE SURE YOUR LINK IS SPECIFIC TO YOUR FLASH. (Should you find that you’ve made an error you can delete by clicking the little red ‘x’ that should appear under your icon. Then re-enter your URL. (If there’s no red x email me at Runtshell@aol.com. I can delete the wrong link for you).
- While our name implies “fiction only” it’s perfectly Kosher to write a non-fiction piece as long as it meets the challenge of being a complete story in 100 words.
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- ***PLEASE MAKE NOTE IN YOUR BLOG IF YOU PREFER NOT TO RECEIVE CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM.***
- REMINDER: This page is “FRIDAY FICTIONEERS CENTRAL” and is NOT the place to promote political or religious views. Also, you are responsible for the content of your story and policing comments on your blog. You have the right to delete any you consider offensive.
**Please exercise DISCRETION when commenting on a story! Be RESPECTFUL.**
Should someone have severe or hostile differences of opinion with another person it’s my hope that the involved parties would settle their disputes in private.
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My story follows the photo and link tool. I enjoy honest comments and welcome constructive criticism.
- Shalom,
Rochelle

Copyright – E.A. Wicklund
Genre: Literary Fiction
Word Count: 99
DUEL
“You’ll see, dear, in the end you’re all better off without me. I can’t…” Marie stopped typing and swallowed four sleeping pills.
“Mommy, whatcha writing?” Her seven-year-old son climbed onto her lap. “Can I read it?”
“No!” She minimized the document screen. “Go back to bed.”
“Uh-uh. I’m scared. I dreamed they put you in a big box and buried it. Daddy cried.”
“It was just a bad dream.”
“Promise…”
“I can’t—”
“…you won’t die.”
“You pathetic fool,” whispered the voices. “Just do it!”
“I can’t.” She swept the bottle beside the keyboard into the wastebasket. “I promise.”
Another “wordsmith” story. Rochelle always weaves a spell binding moment in her quilt of reflections. Good job.
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Well she’s going to have a good sleep at least! Four! That was a fortuitous intervention nevertheless. Nicely done Rochelle.
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Dear Sandra,
She definitely will get some sleep and, hopefully after that, some help. From the mouths of babes…Thank you for commenting.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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saved by her child. Everybody is needed by somebody. Touching and hopeful
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Dear Nightlake,
In this case, she has a son who needs her very much. Thank you for your comments. 😀
Shalom,
Rochelle
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This would have been a much harder story to stomach had she swallowed the entire bottle before the kid showed up. Perhaps now she’ll take a good hard look at her life and get things in order.
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Dear Adam,
Indeed, it would’ve been a different story if she’d already swallowed the entire bottle. One day Marie will reflect on this dark time and take joy in her life. Perhaps as she’s sitting at her son’s college graduation. 😉
Thanks for commenting.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Ugh. So glad she pushed that bottle aside.
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Me, too, Lisa. Me, too.
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Sitting here crying…in German I would say “harter Stoff!” – thanks Rochelle, what a story in just 100 words, you tell a whole life.
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Dear Carmen,
Danke schön. Tears are a high compliment.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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That was almost very very sad… those voices can be quite persuasive. — really good to capture that on the prompt….
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Dear Björn,
Thanks so much. Glad you liked it.
shalom,
Rochelle
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A fortuitous intervention, although I would think that she would have the sense to do this while no one was around! However, there wouldn’t have been the same touching story then. 🙂 As for the next step/s, I agree with Adam. Hopefully she’ll get some help and move on.
janet
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Dear Janet,
Actually she did choose a time when no one else was around. Everyone had gone to bed. But perhaps subconsciously she wanted to be found out before it was too late. I believe she’ll get help. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Kids have a sixth sense. Such a heart wrenching story
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Dear Carrie,
I think you’re right. I have a few spine-tingling experiences with that. 😉 Thank you for your comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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This story makes me feel so bad for all the people who have to live with a mental illness. Tomorrow those voices will still be there making her life a nightmare. As usual. this is far more than a 100 word story. You always give us the heart of the story every week. And I like Carrie’s comment that kids do have a sixth sense.
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Dear Linda,
Yep. One night’s intervention isn’t going to silence those voices. It takes a lot of work to find their roots and then declaw them. But I know Marie will get through it. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Very touching and great true-to-life dialogue
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Many thanks, Claire. Thanks for dropping by.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Sad to say, I know this woman and she’ll try again. She needs help.
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Dear Dawn,
I hope you don’t know her too intimately. Yes, she does need help. If she doesn’t get it she will try again.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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very emotional. i think its beautiful how her child was able to save her.
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Many thanks, KZ.
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The pacing of the dialogue is wonderful — any critique I would have (such as it is) would just be that I can’t relate the tale back to the picture very well, but I supposed the voices could be like the cacophony of seagulls.
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Dear Helena,
Glad you liked the story. Now allow me to explain how I arrived at it from the seagulls prompt. 😉 At first, and maybe second, glance it doesn’t seem to fit, right? I saw past the birds themselves and saw conflict. I suppose it could’ve been a conflict on the beach or at sea, but this is where my my mind went. Anyway, that’s my process in a nutshell.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Oooh, chills. I found myself anxious as I read, and grateful she promised. Well done Rochelle!
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Dear Dawn,
Chills? Chills are good. 😉 Marie’s biggest challenge after this will be to find the courage and strength to keep her promise.
thank you and shalom,
Rochelle
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Yes, good chills. 😉 And I’m optimistic Marie will do it.
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This is heart-wrenching and intense. I still have goosebumps. Fantastic story!
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Dear E. A.
Your high praise gives me goosebumps. Thank you and thank you for the stellar photo.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Intricate…like a spider’s web. I had to look closer…for the fine threads.
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Dear Hugmama,
Your comment is like your screen name…a hug in print. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thank you! Just a question…I wondered why my entry for “Duel” didn’t get posted on your site. I was pretty sure I uploaded it on Linkz. I could be mistaken. Would love your help so I can make sure mine makes it next time…hugs! 🙂
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Let me see what I can do.
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Dear Hugs,
You have linked at #26. 😉 I see that some of us have liked and commented on your duel. Looking forward to getting to know you, seems we have a few things in common. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thank goodness, Rochelle. You set this up, then knocked it down perfectly. I wouldn’t have wanted that to end the other way. If only everyone had such a compelling angel on their metaphorical shoulder.
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Dear Jen,
I’ve often found my children to be my angels, even after a day of cleaning spilled grape juice from a beige carpet, strained bananas from my hair, etc etc. No doubt you’ll find your little Sebastian has his own halo.
Thank you for your comments that mean so much to me.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I’m so glad the child won this duel. Well done. The stakes were high in this one. My birthday is on Friday, Oct. 4. I think I neglected to tell you…that’s something I would do. Anyway, I’m glad you had a happy ending!
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Dear Amy,
I hope you treated yourself to something special on your birthday. Sometimes I just gotta write a happy ending. 😉 Glad you liked it.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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a chilling story that ended well, thank goodness ! it was so effective that you used such simple direct words and sentence constructions, Rochelle, it made it so real and compelling..
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Dear Valerie,
It’s wonderful to see you back in the blogosphere. I’m pleased that you liked my story. Your comments mean a lot to me.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Reblogged this on Bastet and Sekhmet's Library and commented:
This weeks Friday Fictioneers!
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If I was teaching again would really want to use this in a classroom for debate. Really creates an itch for discussion, on so many spin-off topics. Very clever tale.
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Dear Managua,
I love it when one of my stories spawns a debate. 😉 Glad you liked it.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Quite dark and heart-wrenching – what will happen in the future? Maybe she will leave the note on the computer and the pills in the waste basket as a cry for help to her husband? Or will she just try again? What has driven her to it?
I’m worried about the little family now! Very well written.
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Dear Draliman,
I guess the ball’s in Marie’s court. It’s my hope that she’ll get help. As a writer I’m most pleased that you’re emotionally invested enough to be worried. Thank you.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Your story shows the great power of a child, and I hope that power causes the mom in the story to get help beyond a bottle of sleeping pills. It was masterful how you ended the first line — of her typing — with “I can’t” and then brought back to it in the last line. Maybe she can turn that around to “I can.”
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Dear Dave,
“And a child shall lead them.” I think this is a wake up call for the mom. Thank you for your insightful comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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My, this is a quality write Rochelle. Very well done.
(I visit here quite often and one day…one day…will put finger to keyboard and enter.)
Anna :o]
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Dear Anna,
Thank you for dropping by with such nice comments. I’ll look for your entry 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Marie has some demons to handle, and she’s going to have a foggy head in the morning (or afternoon).
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Dear JK,
Better a foggy head than dead one, eh? Thanks for commenting.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Great story…so poignantly beautiful…like the way you were able to bring the pathos out and turn the situation around so neatly.
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Dear Georgia,
Glad you liked the story. Thanks for the high praise in reblogging my story. Compliments don’t get much better than that.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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🙂 and peace to you too! Georgia
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Good for her, for resisting.
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This is just a story, but it did touch a lot of nerves, because those voices can get at you anytime, even if it is your own voice telling you to give up, or get out, and they are loud enough, they drown out the pleas of your own children. However, not to dwell on this, I liked your use of the phrase, “I can’t…” first to say I can’t promise, and next to say, I can’t do this to my child…
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Dear Lindaura,
I’m glad you picked up on my triune use of “can’t”. The only voices I listen to are telling me stories/ 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I only have one word for this. Powerful.
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Dear Jackie,
Two words in return. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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This is rife with tension Rochelle. I love how this thought was birthed out of the picture of two seagulls fighting. What a powerful metaphor.
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Dear Joseph,
I rarely go for the obvious. 😉 Glad you caught my reasoning, Thank you for your kind words.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Gonna live, but 4 pills is gonna give her a heck of a headache when she does wake.
Scott
Mine: http://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2013/10/02/5427/
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Dear Scott,
At least she stopped at four. A headache is the least of her worries. Thanks for commenting.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Yes, you are right!
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This was a wonderfully written story, with such a great arc! Way to go in only 100 words. The mother made the right choice, and I hope this is the last time she has to make it.
And I loved the title, it was so appropriate.
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Dear Danny,
Thank you for such nice comments. I think Marie made the right choice, although, for her, it’s a tough one.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Beautiful, once again. Everyone needs a reason to live, I’m glad hers came in time.
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Dear Patti,
Many thanks for your kind words. Indeed, everyone needs a point and purpose or we’re walking dead.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Thanks for hosting, Rochelle. I’m really enjoying this.
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One of my greatest pleasures, Patti. 😉
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Hi Rochelle,
Like Helena, I was looking for the tie to the prompt, but felt it was rooted in the title ‘Duel’. It felt, to me at least, like the two birds were waging a war for her sanity. Sort of like the angel on one shoulder and the devil on the other from old cartoons. In any case, it worked for me that way. Great story telling and I really appreciate how you take the prompt to a different level. I tend to react superficially and that is where Istay with it.
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Dear Erin,
You’re either very perceptive or you’ve learned how my mind works. ;). You’ve hit the proverbial nail on the head. In any case, I’m pleased the story worked for you. Thank you for your kind words. I think one day, you’ll be ready to take it to new levels and I wouldn’t sell yourself short, I’ve read some good things from you.
shalom,
Rochelle
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You are a great story teller. I’m touched. It’s so true sometimes.
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Dear Indira,
Many thanks. You’ve touched me with your compliments.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Wandean,
This reminds me of the story of the Indian chief with two wolves fighting in his brain (good vs. evil) and his response to the question “who wins?” The answer, of course, is the one you feed the most. At least the wolf is staved off for the time being.
Blessings,
Russ-turd
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Dear Russ-turd,
I’m familiar with the story. And you’re spot on in the application of it to my story. Thanks for dropping by in the early morning hours.
Shalom,
Wandean
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Wow! So poignant. I’m glad she didn’t take the pills, if only for the child’s sake. A heaven-sent intervention, I think.
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Dear Misstiffany,
I do believe in divine intervention. Thank you for your lovely comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I believe in it too. You’re very welcome, it was my pleasure. 🙂
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Very nice way to bring the words full circle, and wonderfully evocative way to show what can bring you back from the brink. I think those voices have been silenced. Well done.
Here’s mine: http://unexpectedpaths.com/friday-fictioneers/white-noise/
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Dear Maggie,
I, too, believe that Marie has made a decision. Glad you caught the circle effect. Thank you for dropping by.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I remember feeling that way a time or two in my life. Such a good story my dear. I’m glad she didn’t continue with her plan. It is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Life is to be lived, even if we feel it isn’t. It is so difficult to get those voice to quiet themselves sometimes. They say so many false things. We must remember that we are good. We are okay.Thank you Rochelle.
Love, Renee
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Dear Renee,
They say to write what you know, right? I’ve felt this way, too and come dangerously close to acting on it. I’m glad I didn’t. I would’ve deprived myself of so many delightful pen pals. 😉
I’m happy you didn’t listen to the voices either. Thank you for dropping by.
shalom,
Rochelle
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The tension is there, right to the end. Very poignant.
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Dear Steve,
Glad to keep you on edge. Many thanks for your comments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Ooh, I know those voices! They’re always there, telling us how unworthy we are! The hairs are standing up on the back of my neck. But then there are the other voices, the ones who on this occasion spoke through her son. This story is scary because so true. Magnificent writing, Rochelle. Truly. Ann
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Dear Ann,
Oh those pesky voices. There’s nothing more gratifying as a writer to know that my story caused the hairs on someone’s neck to stand. Thank you so much for your stunning comments.
shalom,
Rochelle
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I’m shaving my neck … 🙂
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You captured that conflicted feeling when considering suicide.
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Dear Kim,
It is a sticky wicket, the effects of which are far reaching. Thanks for commenting.
shalom,
Rochelle
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Rochelle,
This. I had to collect myself. Having to explain that to a child…oh, gut wrenching.
Honie
You would appreciate Michelangelo’s, The Torment Of Saint Antony, currently in the permanent collection in Fort Worth.
https://www.kimbellart.org/collection/search/view/564?text=Michelangelo%20Buonarroti
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Dear Honie,
“Nice painting”…reminds me of some of the drawings I did during a time of great depression. Happily I’m there no longer.
Your comment touched me. As for explaining it to a child…hard place to navigate. 😉
shalom,
Rochelle
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Hi Rochelle. How can I send you a photo as a prompt?
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Send it as an attachment to Runtshell@aol.com Please make sure your name appears either on the photo or the url. Thanks, Al. I’ll be looking for it.
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Thanks Rochelle. I usually watermark my photos anyway. I’ll send one in minute for you
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Rochelle,
what a gripping story. The epic struggle behind the scenes stood out with just a few words. I’m glad good prevailed in the end.
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Dear David,
I appreciate your feedback and glad you liked my story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I really like the way you keep repeating “I can’t”, with a different meaning each time. Another good one!
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Dear Sharon,
I’m so glad you caught that. Thank you for dropping by 😉
shalom,
Rochelle
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And best wishes to Madison and her new husband!
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Well, Lady, this was one unique take on the prompt! And very well done! It does look as though the seagulls are dueling. But your story also led to thoughts of Edgar Allen Poe’s “The Raven.” He was battling with his addiction in the form of a bird; she was battling with the spirit of suicide: both were dueling for their very life. Quite a feat writing something that puts you into Poe’s category!
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Dear Sandra,
I’m humbled by your comments and am going to have to go reread The Raven. I can’t add more than “thank you” and…
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Hi Rockstar – Thanks for posting this lovely photo of Madison on her wedding day. She’s radiant. She emailed another photo on her Ozark site. Just as gorgeous. Now…where in the devil has Lora been? My laptop died on me a few weeks ago.. I’m waiting for Columbus Day sales to purchase another. In the meantime, I’m using a Computer Room. Hope all is well on your end. Hugs, Lora
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Dear Lora,
Madison has been the wind beneath my wings many times this past year with her technical and emotional support. So I’m really happy to be able to share her happiness with the group she created. 😉
Yes, where indeed have you been? Hope you can join us again soon.
Shalom,
Rockstar
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