OH, ELMO, YOU’VE DONE IT AGAIN!
DOMINIC RILIAN PENDERGAST
Born Sunday, 31 May 2015 at 6:04 a.m.
Congratulations to parents Jennifer (elmowrites) and Jon and big brother Sebastian!
The following photo is the prompt. Does it tell you a story? Tell me in a hundred words or less.
Genre: Realistic Fiction
Word Count: 100
SEA CHANGE
“You’ve changed,” said Dwight.
“You haven’t,” said Elise.
“Where’s the sweet girl I married?”
“Don’t you mean chained, bullied and nearly drowned?” She hefted the last of her suitcases into the car.
“What about the children?”
“They’re adults.”
“What will you do?”
***
Thousands of miles from Iowa, Elise reeled under the impact of the relentless waves that crashed into the rocks along the shore. She peeled off her wet garments and dove into the swell. Water rushed over her naked body, flooding her with a new sense of freedom. She surfaced and inhaled the salt-laden air.
“I will swim!”
Oh my…congratulations! He’s beautiful and well worth staying up for.
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Sorry I got so excited over the new baby I forgot to read the story.
It was beautiful also Rochelle 🙂
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Dear Dawn,
He is a beautiful baby, isn’t he? Glad you thought my story was, too. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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What a wonderful story, free at last.
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Thank you, Loré. There’s a lot to be said for her freedom.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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A series of pictures in words.
We see a woman transformed.
Life in 100 words.
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Dear Elephant,
Your words summarize it quite well. She is a woman transformed.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Lovely baby and a great story of freedom hard won. What your new intro says about it not being a race struck a chord – I take my time over my story and am usually well down the list. I wonder sometimes if I’d get more comments if I was quicker.
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Dear Liz,
It’s a tough call. I fear it’s true that those who post the earliest get the most comments. But some of the stories are written in haste and it shows in typos and weak stories. Then some are quicker thinkers than others.
At any rate I’m glad you liked my story.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Nobody will ever accuse me of being quick. I’m more like a sloth wading through molasses. But wasn’t it the famous philosopher, Totie Fields, who said, “Wait comes to those who are good.” No, maybe it was Weight comes. I can’t remember now. Where were we?
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Dear Russell,
My dad used to have a saying, “Sharp as a matzo ball.” It’s nice to know there’s still someone out there besides me who remembers Totie Fields. 😉
shalom,
Rochelle
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Liz, Please take heart and keep taking your time. There are some Fictioneers who always pop in early that I seldom read because of the low quality of their work. Sometimes I come in early, other times I take longer. I’ve posted as late as Saturday. But, you know what, I have readers who wait and still read my stories. You will too. Building a readership takes time. Polishing a story takes time. Hang in there!
MG
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what a great sense of cleansing and renewal; a sensual baptism into a new life.
Makes me want to peel off them old clothes and dive in myself.
Randy
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Dear Randy,
Thanks for such a great comment. You made my day with that one.
Shalom and happy swimming.
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
I’m sorry you deleted my first comment. This was a very good story.
Aloha,
Doug
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Dear Doug,
What can I say? A slip of the hand, butterfingers on the keyboard. C’est la vie.
Glad You Liked my story In any case.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Congrats Rochelle. Is Elise a mermaid?
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Dear Joseph,
No need for the congrats to me. The baby belongs to our own Jennifer of Elmowrites.
Elise is a woman set free.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Do I sense a bit of realism here, at least in the last part, although not the leaving? Nicely tied (or chained) to the photo, Rochelle.
janet
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Dear Janet,
Oh there’s plenty of realism. 😉 This link might be even more of a clue to whom the chains originate with. http://www.iagenweb.org/boards/ringgold/obituaries/index.cgi?read=233540
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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🙂
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I liked this one! I am rooting for Elise!
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Dear SNB,
I thank you. Elise thanks you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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This was a such a relief.. there can be that sense of freedom when finally freed. I like that you used so many aspects of the image while still not using it literary.
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Dear Björn,
I’m glad you felt Elise’s break from the chains.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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For a moment there, I thought baby Dominic was the prompt. 😀
Your story is beautiful, breaking the chains of her old life, learning to swim… good for Elise.
About the early/late posting. Maybe I should be slower with the posting, I’m always waiting for the prompt and work on it as soon as I can. It’s easier to read and review when I’m finished early, because I don’t want to read others’ stories before I’m done…
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Dear GAH,
When I first joined Friday Fictioneers, the idea was to spend a couple of days on your story before posting it on Friday. Hence the name. I don’t know when it changed. I don’t have a problem with anyone posting Wednesday. Many of us do. But then there are some stories that have a sense of being slapped together just to be first. So my “directive” is actually a suggestion, not pointed at anyone.
Thank you for your lovely compliments to my story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Rochelle, I think this is one of your very best. Love it.
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Dear Alicia,
Thank you, pure and simply.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle, If the baby is part of your family, congratulations. If not, beautiful baby any way.
As for your story, Freedom at Last. I like that she didn’t die, but will finally be free to live.
Blessings,
Phyllis
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Dear Phyllis,
The baby belongs to our own Friday Fictioneer, Jennifer of Elmowrites. He is a beautiful baby.
Elise has a bright future ahead of her. 😉
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Sweet.
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A great story with the freedom she feels through swimming. THAT part is true. I feel the same freedom from long rides on my Harley. I would say, keep up the good work, but then…….what a silly statement. Isn’t it?
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Oh, he’s precious! I can tell you’re in baby love…as you should be!
And I love you’re story. I was concerned that it would take a dark turn. But I’m glad she was set free to swim! ❤
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Dear Lorna,
The baby belongs to one of our fictioneers…elmowrites…Jennifer Pendergast. He is adorable. .
As for my story, no dark turns. Glad you liked it.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thanks for clearing that up, Rochelle.
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Beautiful baby! Congratulations to Jennifer, Jon and Sebastian.
Rochelle,
Beautifully rendered story as always with a strong image of freedom.
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Dear Ansumani,
Thank you for such lovely comments on my story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Mazel tov!! What an adorable baby!! Newborns smell so heavenly, I think it is my favourite perfume:) That story is awesome…how you packed so much in 100 words…freedom at last! You always have a way to slip in a bit of humour in serious situations “What about the children?”
On another note, the other day I had to write a haiku influenced by a painting by Marc Chagall and I could not help but be reminded of what was going on in Russia at that time when he painted le poète allongé https://cheryllynnroberts.wordpress.com/2015/05/27/left-with-dreams-haiku/ So I had to give it one more take and wrote another one about his first love following this one. I look forward to your sequel.
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Dear Oliana,
The baby belongs to Friday Fictioneer, Jennifer of Elmowrites, so the mazel tov goes to her. I just wanted to make the announcement as I did with her first son a couple of years ago. 😉
I’m glad you like my story. I was once told by a therapist that my sense of humor is what kept me from jumping off a roof.
I visited your haiku. Lovely. You have me in some great company. Chaim Potok. I’m honored to receive such a compliment.
Thank you very much.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Aww.. what a cute baby!
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He is a cutie, isn’t he?
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Good for her. Poetic stuff.
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Dear Patrick,
Glad you liked. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thanks for the congrats, I’ve somehow managed to fit in a post this week (no promises about next week!) but as you might imagine, there’s something of a theme. 😉
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Dear Jen,
Always happy to pass along happy news. 😀
Thanks for dropping by.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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What a great story. Nothing likeit. I left an abusive relationship when I got divorced. Nothing like freedom from abuse! 🙂
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Dear Susan,
I’m so sorry you endured an abusive relationship and glad you’re enjoying your freedom. I’m glad my story rang true for you.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
Your story is the perfect analogy for your upcoming retirement.
And . . . Congrats to Jen on a brand new little Fictioneer-lette.
Peace,
MG
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Dear Marie Gail,
You know Elise very well. 😉 Thank you for understanding.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Wonderful story Rochelle! I could picture you swimming (the picture you had on your blog once). She is free – free at last! LOL Perfect story for the prompt.
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Dear Joy,
To me swimming is the ultimate feeling of freedom. Where else would Elise go?
Thank you for your lovely comment. 😀
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I will swim! I’ve been saying “just keep swimming” for years so it’s a fitting metaphor for my retirement too. I’m glad that I’ve never had to leave a bad relationship but I’m glad your character had the guts to do it.
Thanks for sharing Jennifer’s new addition.
Be well,
Tracey
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Dear Tracey,
Swimming is more than an exercise, it’s the ultimate freedom and certainly will be a huge part of my retirement as it’s already and integral part of my life. You can read more of my watery ramblings in my Voice of a Spanish Dancer posts.
If you want to know a little more about my allegorical Dwight click the link. http://www.iagenweb.org/boards/ringgold/obituaries/index.cgi?read=233540
It’s one relationship Elise is every so happy to end. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
Jennifer’s new baby is gorgeous and she had time to do a flash last week.
Since seeing the chains I have not been able to stop singing Jo Cocker’s “Unchain my heart” and can totally relate your flash to the picture prompt. Wonderful flash as always. I was worried for a brief moment that your character was going to drown herself but glad to realise that she was going to swim.
Cheers Irene
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Dear Irene,
A couple of people have said they thought Elise might come to a bitter end. The thought never crossed my mind. She’s going from death to life. 😉
Thank you for your kind words and compliments.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I’m glad to hear that Rochelle. A case of sink or swim. Glad she’s swimming.
Cheers Irene
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drowning in her sorrows, she finally learned how to swim. what a story. by the way, my congrats to jen and the rest of the family.
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Dear Plaridel,
Drowning her sorrows and rising above. Elise is ready to conquer the waves.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Great story, Rochelle, although poor Iowa. 🙂 I like the images of being chained and drowned, versus swimming. By the way, I really like your InLinkz icon this week. Looks good. Hope everything is well with you lately.
-David
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Dear David,
Iowa is something of a metaphor as is Dwight. http://www.iagenweb.org/boards/ringgold/obituaries/index.cgi?read=233540 Perhaps the link will clue you in. 😉
My husband took the picture a few years ago. He’d made one of those comments that made me go, “Oh really?” then he snapped the photo.
Graduation season has ended and things are a little calmer, if you call working in the midst of a construction site calm. The store is undergoing a complete remodel. I go in for eyelid surgery next week so FF will be on autopilot.
Say hello to Leah for me.
Thank you and Shalom,
Rochelle
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I’m glad things are a bit calmer for you. I’m in the middle of an extremely busy June but hopefully the rest of the summer will calm down a bit. On Thursday I was wondering why I was so tired until I realized I’d been at the office for 13 hours that day. But I still write when I can.
I’ll be praying your surgery goes well. Take care,
David
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She will swim! Yes! And she’ll swim naked. Even better. 🙂 Really lovely take, Rochelle. I enjoyed this very much.
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Dear Amy,
I’m glad you enjoyed my story. It’s one of those nearest and dearest to my heart.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Inspirational … I enjoyed this piece very very much! Bastet
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That last line really brings out her joy at her new-found freedom. It’s a shame she stuck with him for so long. Great story!
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Dear Ali,
Yes, she might have stuck with him longer than he deserved but the payoff will be greater in the long run.
Thank you for such a nice comment.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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A great example of escapism.
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Thank you, Peter. 😀
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Dear Henrietta,
I’m surprised you didn’t write one about “The Old Ball & Chain.” There are a lot of men who live in oppressive situations as well. I worked with one man who suffered an aneurism after years of verbal abuse and constant berating. Perhaps he should have gotten naked and gone swimming earlier in the relationship. I love the freedom & liberation at the end. Maybe in some future decade I’ll get to retire too. 🙂
Bigfoot
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Dear Bigfoot,
I have a young friend who was the victim of an abusive wife. Men are certainly not exclusive in the abuse department.
The closer retirement looms on the horizon the more anxiously I await diving into the swell, naked and full of joy.
Thank you for paddling by.
Shalom,
Henrietta
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Uplifting end there, a breaking free moment nicely captured.
As always, great descriptions hidden in little things – the relentless waves, the salt-laden air… great.
Cheers
KT
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Yes! Freedom, sweet freedom! Great job with that one; love it.
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Dear Nadège,
I’m glad you enjoyed my story. Thank you for taking time to read and comment.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I am so happy I discovered your blog and this “quest” yesterday. And I hope many more learns to swim.
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Dear Heidi,
I’m happy to have you aboard. Thank you for taking the time to read and comment.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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What a powerful story. The gain of freedom and independence. She got out of the relationship. The sadness is so many women around the world remain chained.
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Dear Phylor,
Alas, many women don’t think they have any other options…and in some parts of the world that’s woefully true.
Thank you for such nice comments. They’re always appreciated.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I loved that final paragraph Rochelle; it was, frankly, invigorating. 🙂 And beautifully written as always.
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Dear Sandra,
What a lovely thing to say. I can’t stop smiling.
Thank you,
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Kudos to the lady! Free to swim 🙂
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Thank you for such lovely words, Anita.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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The waters of freedom washing away the chains of the past. A truly uplifting tale.
Visit Keith’s Ramblings!
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Dear Keith,
That’s a great summary. Glad you found it uplifting.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Freedom! she seems much happier! Nicely done
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Dear Solo,
Elise will be happier still.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Independence is something we should all swim for. Lovely story!
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Dear Francesca,
Each of us swims in his or her own way. 😉
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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At least she only went swimming. I fully expected her to try to drown. Congratulations for the baby
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Dear Larry,
Nope, she might just swim the English Channel. 😉
The baby’s not mine. He’s the new son of our own elmowrites, Jennifer Pendergast.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Great story! The last line really does it for me!
(I might not e able to write one his week – too busy reading your book!)
What Retirement? I just got here! Were you thinking about swimming?
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Dear Bobi Jo,
So many questions. 😀 Of course I’m really happy to hear that you’re reading my book.
In October I’ll be retiring from my day job as a cake decorator and pursuing my career as an author.
Thinking about swimming? I swim almost every day…alas I’m landlocked so my swimming is in a lap pool. This story is a bit of an allegory that can be taken literally or applied to my work situation. My husband of nearly 44 years and I remain happily married.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Your stories are not only excellent but thought provoking and inspiring also. In 100 words you put a lot. I loved it. It reminded of so many chained women on our side of world who are not so courageous and just drag on. Very sensitive and beautiful tale dear. Shalom.
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Dear Indira,
You always say such nice things.
it makes me sad that so many women are in chains of one kind or another.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle, I can’t express in words How much I love your writing. Sometimes food, shelter, securities, and atrocities in outer world compels them to be captive and then it becomes habit. It takes great courage and will power to break the shackles.
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I like the message of hope after the bad times.
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Dear Mick,
There’s always hope. 😉
Thank you,
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Fantastic story – so full of feeling and energy. The two halves contrast superbly.
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Dear Margaret,
Your words fill me with even more energy.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle
Such a beautiful and contented baby. Takes me back to those days, that feeling of holding my own little ones and breathing in their warm perfection. Anyway, enough of getting broody as I have two lovely grandchildren now, one of them a teenager!
I love your story and can breathe in another sort of perfection there — Elise’s wondrous escape from a bully, with the vast briny ocean representing her freedom.
So well written, as usual.
All best wishes
Sarah
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Dear Sarah,
I’m merely sharing another Friday Fictioneer’s good news. Jennifer of elmowrites just gave birth to her second son. That picture does make me think of those times of warm contentment when I held my own newborn sons.
I’m pleased that my story resonated with you.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Perfect. Swimming is so much better than sinking. Good for Elise
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Dear Samantha,
Swimming is better than just about anything. 😀
Thank you for your sweet words.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Congratulations on the new little one! He is so beautiful. So sweet.
I love your story – a wonderful sense of freedom she feels! I think I’ll feel the same after I leave work today for my beach vacation! Haha!
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Dear Tiffany,
The baby isn’t mine or even related. He belongs to Friday Fictioneer Jennifer of elmowrites.
Freedom indeed, as I look forward to feeling after my upcoming retirement in October.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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He is still beautiful! So congrats to Jennifer. 🙂
A wonderful thing to look forward indeed!
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Such a wonderful sense of freedom. Great story.
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Glad you felt it, too, Audrey.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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A beautiful story about a woman breaking free of the chains that have held her for far too long. 🙂 The final scene portrays her freedom perfectly.
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Dear FM,
May our spirits all be as free as Elise’s. 😉
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I loved your story — love the next to last paragraph — pure sensory and spirit-delight! Freedom! Yay!
By the way, I have a new blog I’m using (started on June 1st, 2015) — sort of made the old one password-protected. I need to go back and clean it up, throw out stuff, do more editing, etc. on that blog. My new blog is: StrangeLander2015
Oh, and I wrote a story this week — sorry I’ve been so out of it! I’ve missed Friday Fictioneers and all the great stories, but this is my last month at my teaching job (I’m quitting to spend time with my husband, daughter and do– and heaving a sigh of relief. All those late nights of grading English papers for seventeen years have left me a hollow semblance of my former self).
I’ll post my story on the InLinkz site.
Thanks for all you do for us!
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Dear Vijaya,
It’s nice to see you here. Your new blog looks nice.
I’m pleased my story stirred emotions. Water always does it for this mermaid. 😉
Thank you.
Shalom,
Your Fairy Blog Mother
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What a beautiful baby boy! Congrats to Elmo and the rest of her lovely family. ❤
The sea has a lot of birth symbolism, what with the salt water and mysterious depths. Many cultures associate that mystery with the womb and how miraculous it is that a child can grow within it.
Maybe I'm making connections where there are none, but I can see how your beautiful story aligns nicely with the beauty of birth. In many ways, that's exactly what Elise has found for herself!
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Dear Emile,
It wasn’t my intention to connect my story with birth. One of those happy accidents. Although Elise’s story is most definitely one of renewal and new birth.
Thank you for such a fantastic comment.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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the link to the picture is great,and short dialogue so real: they say women marry thinking they’ll change him, men marry unaware she’ll grow
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Dear Bea,
Truer words were never spoken. Thank you for reading and leaving such a profound comment.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Wonderful.
Sometimes you just have to take the plunge, say ‘yes’ to life.
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Thank you, Emmy. 😀
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And she did. Good metaphors, Rochelle, for not having freedon, and finally getting free. Realistic and well written as always. What a sweet baby for Jennifer and family. 🙂 — Suzanne
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Dear Suzanne,
Glad you enjoyed Elise’s new freedom. Thank you for stopping by to read and comment. Glad your computer’s back among the living.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Well, we did indeed take very similar paths! It’s just taken me much longer to get to reading! With extra people living in our house, and life a bit dizzying right now, I am behind in just about everything. That said, the check is in the mail, friend. 😉 I wondered if there was a historical link for this one, that I missed, but the story itself is played out over and over… history for us all, I suppose. We have to take charge of our own destinies. No other way– Wonderful story!
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Dear Dawn,
No historical link exactly on this one but it is a bit of an allegory as well as a story of a woman’s release from a bad relationship. As always the author and Elise have much in common. (My marriage is fine 😉 ) I hope things calm for you soon. I’d say there’s a book in your future.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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A totally unexpected ending 🙂
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Dear Colline,
It’s interesting that others found the ending unexpected, too. Completely happy accident. I didn’t mean to mislead anyone to think she was going to drown herself. 😉
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I am really late with my reading and writing for this week but I see you’ve turned in another fine post. Nice story about freedom, liberation and finding yourself. And a such cute baby photo too. My baby turns eighteen this week 🙂
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Dear Subroto,
The baby belongs to our own elmowrites, Jennifer Pendergast. My baby is thirty-one. 😉
I’m glad you liked my story. You caught its full meaning which is gratifying for me as a writer.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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awww beautiful baby and a beautiful story
Tina from The Sunny Side of Life
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Dear Tina,
I can’t take credit for the baby. He belongs to another Friday fictioneer. I just made the announcement. 😉
Thank you for your kind words for the story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Ah yes! And swim we do at times. Really liked this piece, Rochelle.
Ellespeth
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Dear Ellespeth,
I’m glad you liked my story and took the time to say so.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Great story Rochelle. Nothing more to say than has already been said
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Thank you, Weltchy. 😀
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May she continue to find that freedom always 🙂
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Dear Vinay,
I believe Elise is on her way to continued freedom.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Congratulations! Lovely baby
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Dear Kalpana,
The baby’s not mine. He belongs to our own fictioneer Jennifer Pendergast, elmowrites.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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