Summer is the time for vacations, picnics on the beach and reruns on the telly. For me it’s a time to meet a deadline in July for my third novel in my series entitled AS ONE MUST ONE CAN. Many thanks to those of you who responded to my plea for your favorite reruns.
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The following photo is the PROMPT. This week’s retread request is from Jennifer Pendergast. If you’re one of those who wrote a story for this prompt feel free to re-post it and enjoy the respite. Remember that all photos are private property and subject to copyright. Use other than Friday Fictioneers by permission only.
Originally posted here.
Genre: Realistic Fiction
Word Count: 99
PARENT TEACHER CONFERENCE
When other kids give Mrs. Loftis flowers she’s all giggly. But when I bring them she gets frowny.
Why don’t she like me? I read better’n anybody else in first grade and I color in between the lines. Mommy says it’s my ‘magination.
Tonight sirens and mad grown-up voices wake me up. I run to Mommy’s room. She’s crying. So’s her boyfriend.
There’s a gun on the floor and a policeman is putting handcuffs on…Mrs. Loftis? Her face is all twisty and red.
“You cheap husband stealing tramp!” she shouts.
Guess it’s not me she don’t like after all.
That was an unexpected diversion from your usual historical genre. Still plenty of drama, though, and the child’s voice is beautifully rendered
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Dear Neil,
Every so often I’ve been known to step out of my comfort zone. 😉 This is based on a true story but I upped the drama. I’m glad it worked for you. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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It’s so sad that the child had to witness that ugly scene. Great story, Rochelle!
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Thank you, Josslyn. 😀
Shalom,
Rochelle
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You’re welcome! 🙂
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I agree with Neil, the child’s voice is wonderfully done. Great story!
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Thank you, Cheryl. Glad you liked. 😀
Shalom,
Rochelle
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So now she knows why. If only the child’s mother had not used the child to rub dirt in the teachers nose😉
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Dear Michael,
Unfortunately children are often the innocent victims of parental indiscretion. Thank you for coming by. 😀
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Great title, great story, great voice.
Poor wee soul!
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Dear CE,
Great comment. 😀 Great to see you.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Great voice in this piece.
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Thank you, J Hardy. 🙂
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How difficult it has to be for a child to think they are to blame… how tragic, and maybe I should say I’m happy for the resolution though… it seems there was no real bloodshed. The voice of the child (and the story) reminds me of “the curious incident of the dog in the nighttime”.
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Which was an excellent book!
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And a great quote from the greatest detective of them all
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Why do I feel I’m being mocked, Mr. Ayr?
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Well, my dear Dale, usually because you are.
But on this occasion I was merely indicating the origin of the phrase to any lovely Canadian insufficiently erudite to recognise it.
Okay, sweetie?
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All good, darlin’!
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And I feel completely left out on my own page.
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Now you know how I feel all the time. 🙂
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Dear Björn,
Anytime a child has to be privy to something like that it’s tragic. I’ve not read the book in question.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Oh dear, brilliant story Rochelle.
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Thank you, Chioma. 😀
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Love the title! Agree with everyone on the great voice. How awful that the teacher couldn’t separate the child from the mother. He didn’t do no harm!!
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Dear Dale,
Glad you liked the title. 😉 This story is based on the experience of a friend of mine. In her case it was her scout leader. Fortunately, her story never played out like this but she did find out that she wasn’t the reason her scout leader didn’t like her.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Great voice! So life-like and plaintive in its way as your character heads towards a life-changing moment. Well done, Rochelle.
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Dear Sandra,
This was kind of a fun one to write. I’m pleased that it worked for you. Thank you for taking the time to say so.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Great story, Rochelle. I taught Grade 1. How terribly difficult it would be to explain a situation like that to a child. At least there was no bloodshed. Realistic dialog for the child narrator. Well written as always. —- Suzanne
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Dear Suzanne,
I’m pleased to hear that the dialogue rang true. And I’m glad you liked the my grownup story from the mouth of a babe.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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You sure have deviated from your usual way. Its a great take on how parents action reflect on children!
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Dear Whoever You Are,
A little deviation is good for the writer’s soul. Thank you for such a nice comment/compliment.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I’m not sure I can add anything new that hasn’t already been said. Another great piece from you, Rochelle. Thank you.
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Dear Chris,
Thank you for such a nice comment. I’m sort of a comment junkie so I don’t mind repetition. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle,
My spontaneous reaction was a laugh. What a relief for the child.
Best wishes
Helene
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Dear Helene,
I would classify this story as dark humor so laughter is a perfect response. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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A real shocker there, Rochelle. A great rendition of adult occurences through a young child’s eyes. Lovely write 🙂
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Dear Lynn,
From the mouths of babes. 😉 Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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My pleasure 🙂
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Hello, Rochelle!
I loved this story. It’s very different from your more frequent flashes; I quite enjoyed reading it and appreciate your versatility. The MC has a great voice and made me giggle at the end. Great take!
Cheers, Sara
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Dear Sara,
Every so often I step away from the history books. 😉 Thank you for your kind words.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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At least Mommy and the boyfriend are still alive to cry!
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Thank heaven for that, Liz. Thank you for coming by.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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I remember this story. A good story of perspective in thinking we have done something to make people not like us. We should all think hard about that. It’s not always our fault. Right? Of course right. Also……never try to put Rochelle in a particular “box”. Lol. It doesn’t work.
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YIKES!!!! I think I remember this one, but … WOW! Packed a punch.
I want to laugh and be shocked all at the same time.
Five out of five black eyes.
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Thanks for the shiners, Cuzzin Notnek. 😀
Shock and laughter are the desired reactions.
Shalom,
Cuzzin Shelley
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😉
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Yikers! Well, I guess that explains it all. You caught me by surprise, Rochelle. I love it!
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Dear Eric,
I’m happy to have caught you off guard. 😉 Thank you for reading and commenting.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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That was a perfectly-told story, complete in itself, and rich with detail. Brilliantly done, Rochelle! The child’s voice was beautifully rendered.
(And I’m so glad there wasn’t bloodshed!)
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Dear Vijaya,
What a perfectly wonderful comment to receive. Thank you. (I’m saving the bloodshed for my novel. 😉 )
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Nadia,
The child’s problem is obvious and revealed in the second paragraph wherein she states, “I color in between the lines.” She’ll never make it through cake decorating college until she gets beyond that, regardless of who her mother is sleeping with.
Case solved,
Bubba Snakeshit
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Dear Bubba Snakeshit,
There’s nothing I enjoy more than a comment that makes no sense whatsoever. So you can imagine how much I am enjoying yours. I’m sure you never color between the lines. I know I’ve heard Connie say, “Buy him books and buy him books but all he does is eat the pages.” Thank you for your patronage.
Shalom,
Nadia
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I prefer paperbacks. Those hard covers are rough on the teeth. Cookbooks are my favorite.
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Remember Mister Bubba’s last name is pronounced “snaw-KESH-it.”
Remember it ALWAYS. Saludos.
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Hi Rochelle
I think I remember this one. Quite a different style for you. Great twist and brilliantly done 🙂
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Dear EL,
Glad you enjoyed my story and took the time to say so. Thank you. 😀
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Whew, that poor child. Wonderful story with a great twist. At least she won’t have to suffer that teacher any longer.
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Dear Gabriele,
It would be hard for a child to understand. I felt for her. But I suspect the next teacher will be nice to her. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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sad for the child to have such an unfair mother
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Dear Arora,
Very sad for the child. Thank you for coming by.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Interesting twist! Poor little girl. I like her voice, which comes across so clearly in this story.
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Many thanks, Emily. 😀
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Sadly this is often the case: a lot of times people dislike the children of the person their significant other is cheating with. (Sometimes children born out of wedlock are disliked by the spouse of their parent.)
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Dear Kevin,
An innocent child is easily the target in so many cases I think. This one’s based on a true story although it didn’t have quite the dramatic ending. 😉
Thank you for reading and taking the time to comment. Much appreciated.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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life can be so complicated sometimes? 😦
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Complicated indeed, Plaridel. Thank you for coming by.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Still a great story after two years! It hasn’t gone off or anything.
Poor kid, She seems to understand the situation, though. I guess they’ll have a substitute teacher tomorrow, so that’ll be fun.
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Dear Ali,
I’m sure the substitute teacher will be a better fit for this kid. Thank you such a nice comment. I’m enjoying the respite as I’m averaging 500 to 1000 words a day in the novel. And when I’m not at the keyboard I’m spinning story in my head.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Don’t fool around with the teachers.
Nice hat.
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Dear Patrick,
I’d say, don’t fool around with the teacher’s husband. 😉
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle
Brilliant storytelling as ever — as others have already said, especially the child’s voice.
Presently, I’m watching a TV series set in Northern Ireland in which a married man is having an affair with a married teacher. It’s going from bad to worse this story, with both the wronged innocent parties murdered. I dread what’s going to happen to the children.
Have you any idea if Douglas M. MacIlroy is going to reappear in Blogland anytime soon? I was going to link my copyright acknowledgement of his prompt photo to his blog, but he hasn’t posted since last September.
Hope you’re having a wonderful productive week.
All best wishes
Sarah
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Dear Sarah,
It’s sad when there are children involved in sordid affairs. That TV series sounds kind of awful.
I’m averaging between 500 to 1000 words a day on the novel and when I’m not typing I’m spinning story in my head.;)
Your question I’ve answered in a private email.
Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle
Being a true story, it’s particularly awful. The woman spends 20 years haunted by her actions and feeling the most terrible guilt, even though she has tried to put the whole thing behind her, caring for her children and being a loving wife to her second husband (not the murderer).
You sound as if you’re being very disciplined with your novel. I love it when one is working on a first draft and spinning the story most of every day, whether at the computer or not.
Thanks for your email.
All best wishes
Sarah
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Like so many others, I loved the voice in this. Brilliantly told 🙂
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Many many thanks, Clare. Glad you liked. 😀
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Yes, as Clare says, the voice was so believable. And it’s not your usual slant – stepping outside the comfort zone can be exhilarating! Thank you for hosting again this week Rochelle, I don’t know how you do it!
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Dear Freya,
Every so often I step away from the expected. It is exhilarating. 😉 Of course this one is a couple of years old. For the next couple of months I’ve let other people choose their old favorite prompts. So like television it’s summer reruns.
Friday Fictioneers is a labor of love for me for a number of reasons. However, presently, I’m in the throes of meeting a deadline for my third novel. So the reruns are a way to clear my head for novel writing. I hope that made some kind of sense.
At any rate, thank you for your kind words.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Yes, I had pickked up on your third novel deadline – how exciting! I wish you all the very best. Balancing FF with your work sounds like a challenge.
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Don’t know how you find the time with your deadline Rochelle. I hope the book is going well, don’t waste your time on a reply you have a lot on your plate! Best wishes, James
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Thank you, James. 😀
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Oh..I totally remember this! Just as thought provoking now as it was the first time.
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Thank you, Dawn. I’m glad it rang true the second time around.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Wonderful child POV story with a lovely twist at the end. Cheers Irene
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Dear Irene,
Your comment made me smile. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Wonderful story-telling. Disturbing that it’s based on a real event. I love the child’s voice.
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Dear Margaret
Fortunately, the actual event wasn’t quite so dramatic. 😉 Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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The title ties well to the story ending – the parent-teacher conference in the bedroom. I feel sad for the child. Great job giving a voice to the child in the story.
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Dear Ansumani,
Your comments make me smile. A friend of mine is fond of saying that a good title adds another 100 words. Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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