10 July 2020

Published July 8, 2020 by rochellewisoff

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The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit. 

PHOTO PROMPT @ A. Noni Mouse

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Genre: Hysterical Fiction

Word Count: 100

I REST MY CASE

My son slept on a mattress on the floor. Dirty glasses and plates with mold enough to save the planet from infection littered his room. Filthy clothes and towels covered the bed.

I fumed. “You could hide a body in this room.”

One morning I went to wake him for work. No Evan. I even called his friends.

My heart thrashed at red smears on my white cabinets.

Before I could call the police, Evan entered the kitchen. “Mo-om, why didn’t you wake me? Oh, sorry about the spaghetti sauce.”

“Told you. You can hide a body in that room.”

102 comments on “10 July 2020

    • מיכל יקרהת

      Oh yeah, the stench was there, too. Not enough words to describe it fully. 😉 Thank you for feeling my pain. Fortunately he grew into a responsible adult.

      שלום
      רחל

      Like

  • Sounds kind of like the voice of experience after three boys, huh? Loved the spaghetti sauce! The photo kind of reminded me of what our kitchen looked like when I was three or four.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Iain,

      Just so you know. I found both of your comment attempts in my trash folder…with Dale’s. Go figure. I don’t know why this is happening. At any rate, perhaps you’ll be lucky with your kids. Not all of them are slobs in their teen years. Although mine were. 😉 Thank you.

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

  • Dear Rochelle,

    I know of what you speak. Funny how my dishes multiply when they decide to clean their rooms… Suddenly, I have the proper set of plates and bowls and cutlery…

    Shalom and Lotsa ya-gotta-love-em-anyway love,

    Dale

    Liked by 1 person

  • I appreciate you leaving out the ‘odor’ so we not have to imagine that … (oy, now I just did … ;)) This was fun!
    And, yeah, who knows how many bodies are hiding in some such rooms … 😉 or could be …
    Na’ama

    Liked by 1 person

    • Na’ama Y’karah,

      Sorry, I’m just getting around to replies. It’s been a hectic week. Partly because I’m under the gun to finish my novel in progress. Not a bad thing when an agent and publisher are interested. 😉
      As for the room. Even his girlfriend dubbed it The Bermuda Rectangle. If I’d thought of it sooner, it would’ve been the title.
      Happy to spare your olfactory. 😉

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

  • Rochelle, perfect title for your story. It reminds me of my sons’ rooms when they lived at home. Now in their 30’s, one is still a slob (takes after me) but one is a neat freak (setting a new trend for the family.)
    Shalom,
    Lisa

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Lisa,

      If I’d been thinking about it, the title would’ve been his girlfriend’s word for it at the time, The Bermuda Rectangle. Actually, this one has become something of a neat freak. Boggles my mind. He has all of his CD’s (which number in the 100’s or more) in alphabetical order. Go figure.
      Thank you. Guess mothers everywhere can relate. 😉

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

  • I can relate. I always get stuck with messy people. Your story takes me back to my childhood and why my brother and I could not share a room. The spaghetti sauce reminds me of my roommate. She cooks. I clean. It looks like a murder scene when she makes spaghetti. Once, she got spaghetti sauce on the ceiling. I don’t know how it was possible.

    Good story. I would have enjoyed it more if it didn’t stroke my PTSD.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Nobbin,

      Sorry to stroke your PTSD. I hope you’re not having terrible flashbacks. 😉
      My childhood was the reverse. My older brother was the neat one. My mom used to just keep the door to my room shut. My dad jokingly said I hung my clothes on the floor. I guess my little acorns didn’t fall far from the tree.

      Thank you.

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

  • There is humour in this as it reflects the truth about sons and daughters. I think when they are worried (mostly over nothing) they tend to ignore the world around them.
    My teenage daughter once complained there were no glasses left in the kitchen.
    Yes, I know, I told her. That is because they are all in your bedroom.
    She said, If you knew they were there, why didn’t you bring them back to the kitchen.
    Honestly, I said. With all the mould growing in them I didn’t want to disturb your biology experiments.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Brenda,

      Hamster cage? I like that. My son’s girlfriend at the time aptly referred to his room as The Bermuda Rectangle. 😉 I am quite well, thank you. 😀 and thank you for your sweet comments on my story.

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

  • Funny story, Rochelle. Oddly enough, our son was the neatest of our two children. Once in a restaurant, my two-year-old son watched the waiter sweeping the carpet with a short-handled sweeper. I noticed a short time later he had grabbed the sweeper and was energetically doing the same. He also watched the maid when we were staying some days in a Holiday Inn. I later found him with a washcloth wiping down the tile walls in the bathroom as he had seen her do. He’s now married to a woman as clean as he is. 😀 — Suzanne

    Liked by 1 person

  • I had an interesting time reading the comments, I could not help laughing all the way down. My last two boys have me always fuming over the sloth and filth in their rooms. Unwashed cloths, plates and cups for days and the smell! Oh no! Now I know and feel somewhat relieved it is a universal situation. 🙂 There is hope yet. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Celestine,

      I do believe the problem is universal. The operative is “boys” although I was kind of that way as a girl, so my little acorns didn’t fall far from the tree. Fortunately they seem to have outgrown their slovenly ways. 😉 Thank you.

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Liked by 1 person

  • Dear Alfredia Hitchcock W(T)F,

    Nice build up of suspense, but the end was more Mel Brooks than Hitchcock. Was this your tribute to Carl Reiner?

    I used to make the same remarks about hiding a body in Jesse’s room. 🙂

    I didn’t play this week, but wanted to read yours. Glad I did.
    Liza’s Dad

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Liza Jane’s Daddy,

      Please get that tennis ball under the sofa.

      It’s nice to think of my story as a tribute to Carl Reiner. I’m mourning the loss. I wonder if Mel Brooks won’t be far behind (even if he is 2,000 years old). 😦 Truth is, I cut my first tooth on Carl Reiner’s comedy. My dad was a huge Your Show of Shows fan. At any rate, thank you for high praise.

      My son’s girlfriend in high school referred to his room as the Bermuda Rectangle. Wish I’d thought of that as a title first.

      Shalom,

      Alfredia Hitchcock W(T)F

      Liked by 1 person

  • I think my room was kept much tidier than what my daughters keep theirs. Possibly because of lessons learnt in a boy’s boarding school where if your locker is not clean the consequences were much severer and painful 😉 Or boys are just neater 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    • Dear Subroto,

      When I was growing up, my older brother was the neat one. My room, on the other hand, was a constant disaster. However where neatness is concerned I’d never say boys were better at it than girls. My son(s) are a case in point. Again…The Bermuda Rectangle. 😀

      Shalom,

      Rochelle

      Like

  • Querida Rochelle,
    I wanted to stop by and see some of the stories from last week.
    I hit my hand on the pool tiles while trying to swim. LOLOL – swollen left hand. Getting better!
    YIKES … on your story. No disrespect to anyone who does these things. I never had a mess nor did my kids. Could it be from being beaten to my bones as a child if I did?
    MMmmm … I have had friends complain about their children. Well … since I can’t relate I’ll just say … nada. LOL
    Abrazos y Carino,
    Isadora 😎

    Like

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