Dark Humor

All posts in the Dark Humor category

9 May 2025

Published May 7, 2025 by rochellewisoff

Like us on Facebook

The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit. 

PHOTO PROMPT © Lisa Fox

CLICK TO JOIN

I admit this is quite similar to a story/rant i wrote five years ago February Nothing’s changed. If anything things have only gotten worse. So you may refer this as a sequel.

Genre: Anectdotal Rant
Word Count: 100

ONE PILL CAN KILL

Every day a new one appears. If you live in these Divided States, you know what I’m talking about. Prescription drug advertisements.

Who comes up with those colorful names? They’re insane, usually starting with the letters X and Z. They treat everything from obesity to bipolar disorder.

Ya gotta love ‘em—from bright and breezy to sensual and sleezy. They all make me queasy. While happy people prance across the screen celebrating life, the gentle voice over recites a list of possible side effects.

Wait! I got lost somewhere between anaphylaxis and cardiac arrest. What was this supposed to treat?

***************************

Okay, this one starts with A. But it’s pretty much what I’m talking about.

12 July 2024

Published July 10, 2024 by rochellewisoff

Like us on Facebook

The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit. 

PHOTO PROMPT © Ronda Del Boccio

CLICK HERE TO HOP ABOARD

Genre: Histerical Fiction
Word Count: 100

THE THLOT PICKENS

“It was a matter of time,” I told Lois. “The man was evil personified. He cast a dark shadow on everything and everyone. It boiled down to where and when.”

            Lois looked up from her register. “How did you end up doing it?”

            “Derringer at close range.”

            A gasp interrupted our conversation. I turned to see a blue-haired lady clutching a cantaloupe, her eyes wide and mouth agape.

            Busted! My cheeks blazed. I flashed a sheepish grin. “Sorry, I didn’t realize anyone else was listening.”

            “Not to worry,” Lois pointed at me. “She’s just a crazy writer.”

It’s not exactly fiction. An author needs to be careful what she says in public. 😉 Believe me, this character really did need killing.

***********

1 December 2023

Published November 29, 2023 by rochellewisoff

Dear Friday Fictioneers,
Our Word Press woes continue to challenge us. Some report not being able to comment on some posts at all. If you think you might be missing someone’s comments, check your spam or trash folders. I’ve found quite a few in mine. Also, many of my commentors are showing up as “Anonymous” or “Someone.” If there’s a doubt, please identify yourself. Sorry I can’t be of more help in these situations. I’m merely a user, not a tech. 😉 Thank you.
Shalom,
Rochelle

Like us on Facebook

The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit. 

PHOTO PROMOT © Fleur Lind

CLICK TO JOIN

Genre: Speculative Fiction
Word Count: 100

ELECTROMAGNETIC PULSE

Couched in complacency, we never saw it coming.

The first few hours weren’t bad. We figured the electric company would remedy the problem while we enjoyed sandwiches by candlelight. Breaking from social media to actually communicate was nice.

After a month we were still in darkness and the grocery shelves were bare.

My car with its solid-state circuit for a brain is a useless hunk of metal.

Local doctors are at a loss to treat the simplest ailments.

Real books are in demand.

We’re learning to live off the land, but the internet is dead and silence is deafening.

Weekend Writing Prompt – Histrionics

Published October 31, 2020 by rochellewisoff

A word prompt to get your creativity flowing this weekend.  How you use the prompt is up to you.  Write a piece of flash fiction, a poem, a chapter for your novel…anything you like.  Or take the challenge below – there are no prizes – it’s not a competition but rather a fun writing exercise.  If you want to share what you come up with, please leave a link to it in Sammi’s Comment Section.

This one’s fiction for me…but tragically not for everyone. 

 

REPARATION

Each time he’d wail and beat his chest. “It’ll never happen again.”

Histrionics and lies.

Cosmetics couldn’t conceal the vicious truth.

Her flight left at 06:30.

At 10:00 they found the gun in his hand.

“Suicide,” said police.

Gazing out the airplane’s window, she smiled. “Nope. Never again.”

14 February 2020

Published February 12, 2020 by rochellewisoff

Like us on Facebook 

The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit.

PHOTO PROMPT © Rochelle Wisoff-Fields

Click the Frogs (who aren’t blue) to Hop Along

Genre: Histrionic Fiction

Word Count: 100

OVERDOSE

It’s an icy Missouri day that makes me want to swaddle myself in flannel, sip hot chocolate and watch ancient black and whites.

I flip through the channels. There. “Mr. Deeds Goes to Town. Love me some Gary Cooper.” I settle in.

 All at once, one of my favorite movie moments where Longfellow Deeds expresses his admiration for Mary Dawson is interrupted by a drug advertisement. An adorable toddler chases after an irresistible puppy while the announcer rattles off the possibly fatal side effects.

Aromatase inhibitors? Sulfonylureas? Cosentix? Eliquis? Methotrexate?

I’d walk a mile for an old fashion cigarette commercial.

*Note: I don’t know if this is a United States only lament but it seems there’s a new drug on the market every day. It’s not like we can go to the local pharmacy and get these without a prescription so I don’t know why we’re bombarded with annoying advertisements.  

CLICK HERE for more info

7 June 2019

Published June 5, 2019 by rochellewisoff

Dear Friday Fictioneers,

While I realize my page is FF central where you come for the prompt and instructions,the lower half of the page is also my comment section. In light of this, I have a favor to ask of all of you. When you have an issue such as problems with linking in the inLinkz or have a technical question, please direct these to my email runtshell@gmail.com. I check my email as often as I look at my comments (which I also appreciate greatly). Thank you for your consideration.

Shalom,

Rochelle

Like us on Facebook 

The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit. 

PHOTO PROMPT © Ceayr

CLICK ZE FROG, S’IL  VOUS PLAIT

Genre: Murder Mystery

Word Count: 100

KARMA BITES

Detective Lowry studied the corpse and otherwise orderly apartment. “Cause of death?”

Medical Examiner Gayer zipped the body bag. “It could’ve been the knife in his back, the bullet through his heart or the blunt force trauma to his skull with a flower pot.”

The detective donned a pair of rubber gloves and lifted a shattered laptop from a mound of potting soil. “Nothing seems out of place unless you count this and the old Scot, of course. Going to be a tough case to crack.”

“Not enough evidence?”  

“On the contrary. Ten women have already confessed to the crime.”

17 November 2017

Published November 15, 2017 by rochellewisoff

Like us on Facebook

Our Mantra

The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit. 

PHOTO PROMPT © J Hardy Carroll

Please be considerate and keep your stories to 100 words. Thank you. 

get the InLinkz code

Genre: Realistic Fiction

Word Count: 100

LAST RITES

Grandma Tollard met Jeannie at the front door, her long grey hair askew. She seized Jeannie’s arm with one bony hand. “Thank you for coming, dear.”

“What happened?”

“I…we, that is…he…he had a heart attack and—”

“Did you call 911?”  

“—he’s dead. I called Fr. Jenson.”

Grandma clutched her lace peignoir robe at the neck and led Jeannie to the bedroom. Biting her quivering lip, Jeannie pulled the sheet over her grandfather’s grinning countenance.

She wrapped a comforting arm around her weeping grandmother.

Grandma sniffed. “I’ll never forget his final words to me.”

“What were they?”  

“‘Hi-ho Silver!’”

Many thanks to my BFF Jeannie O’Hare for her generosity in allowing me to share her strange but true family stories. Some things just can’t be made up…but they can be embellished. 

Jeannie and me

To hear my interview on Impact USA radio last week  CLICK HERE

30 December 2016

Published December 28, 2016 by rochellewisoff

happy New Year

As in years past, our mantra in 2017:

South KC Sky Banner

Blue Ceiling FF

Like us on Facebook

The next photo is the PROMPT. Remember, all photos are property of the photographer, donated for use in Friday Fictioneers only. They shouldn’t be used for any other purpose without express permission. It is proper etiquette to give the contributor credit. 

PHOTO PROMPT © Shaktiki Sharma

PHOTO PROMPT © Shaktiki Sharma


get the InLinkz code

Genre: Biting Satire

Word Count: 99

QUAFF A CUP TO THE DEAD

“Those eyes,” she whispered. “They set my eighteen-year-old heart aflame.”

My grandmother, an actress and fashion model in the 1930’s, fascinated me. She turned 87 on New Year’s Day 2000. Even in her illness, she insisted her silver hair be perfectly coifed.

“He’s coming for me today. I must be ready to greet him.”

I kissed her rouged parchment-thin cheek. “Nana, he passed away in 1956.”

“Lies! Dracula never died.”  

On the television screen, in black and white, Bela Lugosi bent over the ill-fated Mina. A wheezing sigh escaped Nana’s crimson lips as they spread into a peaceful smile.

 

If you’d like to know more about Mr. Lugosi click HERE.

15 July 2016

Published July 13, 2016 by rochellewisoff

Summer Showcase

Summer is the time for vacations, picnics on the beach and reruns on the telly. For me it’s a time to meet a deadline in July for my third novel in my series entitled AS ONE MUST ONE CAN. Many thanks to those of you who responded to my plea for your favorite reruns. 

Erie Canal

Like us on Facebook

Our Mantra:

South KC Sky Banner

The following photo is the PROMPT. This week’s retread request is from Jennifer Pendergast. If you’re one of those who wrote a story for this prompt feel free to re-post it and enjoy the respite. Remember that all photos are private property and subject to copyright. Use other than Friday Fictioneers by permission only. 

PHOTO PROMPT Copyright-Sandra Crook

PHOTO PROMPT © Sandra Crook

get the InLinkz code

Genre: Histrionic Fiction

Word Count: 100

Original Post Here

TO THE SHEARING

            My seventh-grade social studies teacher strode the aisles like a stalking tiger.

            “If Seventeen Magazine told you to, you kids would hang beach balls around your necks and dangle pop cans from your ears.”  

            I squirmed in my striped mini dress that varied only in color from seven others in the room.

            “What’s wrong with wanting to fit in?” I asked.

            “You know anything about lemmings?”

            “Good in pie topped with meringue,” whispered the boy behind me.

            My teacher extended his arm, hand straight, palm down and shouted, “Turn in your textbooks to page 245, ‘The Indoctrination of Hitler Youth.’”

***

When Jennifer chose this prompt I was more than happy to comply. TO THE SHEARING remains one of my favorite stories. Not only for the subject matter but because it’s based heavily on one of my favorite, if not most memorable teachers of all times. He worked hard to teach a bunch of awkward pubescent adolescents to think for ourselves. To Kevin McShane, wherever you may be, I salute you!” 

McShane's Admonition

10 June 2016

Published June 8, 2016 by rochellewisoff

Summer Showcase

Summer is the time for vacations, picnics on the beach and reruns on the telly. For me it’s a time to meet a deadline in July for my third novel in my series entitled AS ONE MUST ONE CAN. Many thanks to those of you who responded to my plea for your favorite reruns. 

Thoreau MugsFriday Fictioneers and Poppy

Like us on  Facebook

The following photo is the PROMPT. This week’s retread request is from Jennifer Pendergast. If you’re one of those who wrote a story for this prompt feel free to re-post it and enjoy the respite. Remember that all photos are private property and subject to copyright. Use other than Friday Fictioneers by permission only. 

Copyright - Douglas M. MacIlroy

PHOTO PROMPT © Douglas M. MacIlroy

get the InLinkz code

Originally posted here.

Genre: Realistic Fiction

Word Count: 99

PARENT TEACHER CONFERENCE

            When other kids give Mrs. Loftis flowers she’s all giggly. But when I bring them she gets frowny.

            Why don’t she like me? I read better’n anybody else in first grade and I color in between the lines.  Mommy says it’s my ‘magination.

            Tonight sirens and mad grown-up voices wake me up. I run to Mommy’s room. She’s crying. So’s her boyfriend.

            There’s a gun on the floor and a policeman is putting handcuffs on…Mrs. Loftis? Her face is all twisty and red.

            “You cheap husband stealing tramp!” she shouts.

            Guess it’s not me she don’t like after all.        

Thru Violet's Lentz

My view, tho' somewhat askew...

Rochelle Wisoff-Fields-Addicted to Purple

Growing older is inevitable. Growing up is optional.

Linda's Bible Study

Come study God's Word with me!

Just Writing!

A place to improve my writing skills, and that's all.

lindacapple

Writing from the Soul, Speaking from the Heart

Real World Magic

Bringing Visions to Life

Riverbrat

Navigating the mountains and valleys of everyday life on the riverbank.

Our Literary Journey

Driveling twaddle by an old flapdoodle.

Saania's diary - reflections, learnings, sparkles

Life is all about being curious, asking questions, and discovering your passion. And it can be fun!

Invincible Woman on Wheels

Conquering the World

This, that and the other thing

Looking at life through photography and words

Kelvin M. Knight

Reading. Writing. Cycling.

Na'ama Yehuda

Speech Language Pathologist, Writer, Blogger -- life, language, communication, a good laugh, hope, healing, and the grace of connection

Diane's Ponderings

Psalm 19:1 The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands.

Penz-o-Paula

Paula Shablo

Lost Imperfect Found

Self-discovery through self-reflection.

Sarah Potter Writes

Pursued by the muses of prose, poetry, and art

Sammi Cox

Author Aspiring

Neil MacDonald Author

A writer's journey

Autumn Leaves

For those who enjoy fiction

Native Heritage Project

Documenting the Ancestors

Living In Eternity

If Eternity Is Forever, Am I There Now?